I need to give up alcohol completely

[Nowinetoday]

I’m posting this to make myself accountable, recently I’ve drunk crazy amounts, more than normal and so much I was sick on a couple occasions. Last night I had scary heart palpitations, dizziness, shortness of breath and generally feeling terrible. It frightened me and made me really think what am I doing. I know it’s holidays and everyone’s drinking more but this is really excessive.

I usually drink half a bottle of wine and maybe a beer or 2 or gin. I tell myself it’s not every night but it is. I’ll regularly drink much more.

My sleep is terrible, I’m struggling to get things done the next day, I feel sick, I’m irritable and tired and I can’t lose weight. I want to go the gym but most days I’m too hungover to manage it.

I can’t cut down, I’ve tried and I’ll do ok for a week or a few days but next thing I know I’ve got carried away and had way too much again.

I’ve added up the units over the last 7 days, those I can remember, and it’s frightening and embarrassing. I have a decent job a lovely family and I’m risking everything, I genuinely thought I was having a heart attack last night, if this carries on one day I will be. I’ve got to stop.

Its so much part of my life, my social life revolves around drinking, all my friends and family drink I worry how I’m going to manage it.

I did it by switching to alcohol free drinks. Some people say that it's a bad idea, but it worked for me. Opening a bottle and drinking out of a wine glass helped with the habit side of drinking, it meant that people didn't notice - it's not their business, but people do want others to drink with them - and it felt more 'natural' (I know, but I was drinking heavily) to mark the passage from day to evening with an 'adult' drink.

I went for fizzy 'wine', but there are other dupes out there. Seedlip 'gin' or AF beers (Erdinger isn't bad at all) for instance. Get a few bottles in, and switch your drink when you go out, and before long it becomes second nature. It's over 5 years for me now, and I was knocking back a lot more than you, from the sound of things.

Good luck - it's worth it.

I'm sure others will come along with better advice, but I would start with making a list of the reasons why you need to give it up to remind yourself when you are wavering. Alcohol is so accepted in society but the reality is it is hideously dangerous and takes so many lives. You mention a family- how would you feel if they had to manage without you because you couldn't stop drinking. Not wanting to sound brutal sorry- but it is just the reality. An immediate member of my family (who was fairly outwardly functional, had a good job, good social life etc) died suddenly overnight due to alcohol misuse- I wish someone had spelled out to him what was at risk. I've also then known someone else die in similar circumstances, also leaving a family behind. Maybe consider joining AA for support, and consider if there's any new hobbies you could start to build a new network around non-drinking activities? If you can afford it therapy may also be worthwhile as usually there are underlying issues behind excessive alcohol intake. I've no doubt it will be hard - but it will also be so worth it. If you are into reading I found that Quit Like a Woman - Holly Whittaker changed the way I thought about drink and made me realize how messed up societal norms are in that regard. Good luck, it sounds like you know what you have to do, wishing you all the best with it.

I used to drink really heavily too...for years and years and I couldn't seem to stop. I'd make promises to myself daily that I never kept. This is going to sound really stupid but the thing that stopped it all for me was just going to bed really early. The alcohol had me permanently tired and one night instead of going to the off licence, I just went to bed. There was something about breaking that wine@9 routine I'd got myself into that after a week just helped me not to go back to it. Nothing beats getting up in the morning and feeling clear headed.

I hope you find your way out because I know how miserable it is when it feels like a compulsion.

Well done for your post OP. I also need to cut down/stop so will be doing dry January - a mumsnetter posted a support thread about it recently. Maybe give that a go?

Thank you for the replies, seeing it written down makes it more real that this is actually serious if that makes sense. I’ve ordered that book just now thanks for recommending.