Help with drinking problem

[Weasel666]

I don't know where to start with this, it's such a mess. My DH has had an on and off drink problem for a few years now. Since he had last had some counselling etc he been much better I thought, but I've recently discovered he's started again at night after I've gone to bed. He looks like he's getting through two thirds of a bottle of spirits a night. I haven't talked to him about it again yet as don't know where to start or what to say. I feel so alone with this as I'm embarrassed to talk to friends about it but I know he needs help. Can anyone offer any advice or where to look for help? Thanks.

Find a local al-anon meeting to attend.

www.al-anonuk.org.uk/

Sorry you're dealing with this. I'm a recovering alcoholic and happy to answer questions from that perspective.

Get support for yourself as mentioned above - it will help you feel less alone and it will help you set boundaries.

Put yourself first - you can't pour from an empty cup. Looking after yourself and any DC before you think of him is not selfish, it's sensible.

Take a deep breath and accept that secret drinking is an indication that his dependence is very serious. You may need to take drastic action - make sure you are supported if that turns out to be necessary.

Keep posting here, there are many people like @MissConductUS _ (Hi!) who can talk you through things from your husband's perspective and also many people (like me) who are or have been where you are now. There's a little support group running in this section of the boards too.

]flowers]

Thank you. I've seen the support group thread too so will follow that, although reading it made me feel really depressed!

Thanks both. I did have an initial chat with him a couple of weeks ago now where I got very upset. I just asked him to listen to what I was saying which he did. Only result of that so far is that he's now moved his hiding place so I can't see how much he's drinking. I will do all anon once my DS is back at school.... My focus is on him at the moment, DH can wait.

So basically he doesn’t want to stop, and that’s his right.
You need to think about what life you want your child and yourself to live.