DH’s drinking over 8 nights

[Doseydots]

He’s always liked a drink but I am starting to get a little concerned after going through the recycling. The recycling was last collected on 27th April. He’s not had a drink for 3 of those nights. We have teenage DDs who have started commenting on how much he drinks. It hasn’t got worse, it’s always been this amount but I have buried my head in the sand about it.

He has a good steady job, adores me and our girls. He just thinks this is normal behaviour and loves a drink. His dad was a big drinker too. I tend to drink a bottle of wine a week, maybe more if we are out with friends. This week I’ve had covid and not fancied drink and I think this has opened my eyes to what he is drinking.

How do I approach this with him. When things have been brought up in the past, he’s either laughed it off or been defensive.

The frequency, and the amount, seems a lot to me. Even if a can/bottle is only 1 unit (it isn’t) and the bottle of wine the average 10 units I’ve counted up at a minimum of 42 units there over the 8 nights.

you will get loads of MNers saying it’s not a lot and that it’s fine but there are huge health risks (increased cancer risk for one) with drinking more than the 14 units maximum recommended a week.

To be honest I don't think that looks that bad! 30 or so beers over 8 nights- not great but not the worst either!

I couldn't count them all properly, is that about 6 beers and 5th bottle of wine per drinking night?

What's the actual problem?
Are there responsibilities that he's not fulfilling?
Is there reason to be concerned about his health?
Are there financial issues?

I think you will struggle to engage him if you approach it from the angle of "I just don't like it/don't think it's normal" but presumably there is something underlying your feelings.

Thank you for all your replies.

There’s no problem at all I was just concerned. He recently went to the go for an over 50’s health check and was advised to lower his alcohol intake. Which he laughed off. We have no financial worries, and pulls his weight around the house.

That’s a bottle of wine yes. He tends to have a bottle of wine open to drink alongside his beer.