My feed

to access all these features

Mumsnet doesn't verify the qualifications of users. If you have medical concerns, please consult a healthcare professional.

Alcohol support

I'm seriously worried about his health!

28 replies

MummaMinxi · 10/09/2021 23:13

Been with my partner 13yrs, we have 5 kids, 4 live with us & the youngest 2 are his biologically .
He has always been a drinker, began at around 14yrs old, consumption grew with age then by 18 was dealing & taking drugs.
When we got together, he was no longer a dealer but still drank heavily & dabbled in drugs.
We were only meant to be a fling but we got pregnant. He accused me of cheating when I told him & refused to even acknowledge me for a week. I gave him the choice to walk but he stayed.
His drinking since then has increased more & more over time; on a bad day he can start drinking as early as 6.45/7am(1/2 beers) not sure if he drinks during the day but then comes home by 4.30, normally with a beer already open & 5 more for the night, most he will drink, maybe leave one for the morning.
In 2016 a doctor told him his liver wasn't functioning properly, that's all he told me, no further tests or anything ever mentioned or done. It's now 5yrs later & he is showing major signs of, what scares me to my soul, liver disease/cirrhosis. He has a yellow tinge, major mood shifts, memory problems, swollen stomach (but he thinks that's extra weight....only in his stomach 🤦‍♀️) he's always tired, saw his stool the other day & it was so so pale & sorry for TMI but I can hear it falling out of him when he goes 🤢
I've been looking on the dreaded Google & have panicked myself slightly...going by Google, his symptoms & my maths, I work out he has a life expectancy of 9-12yrs and has already lived 5 of them (that's if we go by docs appointment, so could be more years wasted)😭😭
Are there any nurses/doctors/survivors/someone who can help ease my anxieties 🙏🙏🙏

OP posts:
Poppy298 · 13/09/2021 11:34

I really feel for you as my own dad was an alcoholic, he passed when I was in my late teens and my poor mum felt exactly like you did. He passed unexpectedly, there were warning signs and he too was terrified of dying and I genuinely believe he took the “I’d rather not know” approach hence why he didn’t seek medical help towards the end. If you ever need a chat I’m here x

theemmadilemma · 13/09/2021 11:59

How is his eating OP? Usually by this stage I'd be expecting him to be struggling with food and taking most of his fuel via alcohol. I also highly suspect he is drinking through the day. If he needs to start early (to cope with withdrawal) then he'll need to 'fuel' it through the day as well.

I would suspect he's got a lot less time than you think. I wasn't quite as ill as him, but I was malnourished and starting to show signs of jaundice when I finally got help.

I'm sober two years now, luckily for me, I didn't do any permanent liver damage. How, I will never know.

Candleabra · 13/09/2021 12:39

says he's petrified of dying yet won't stop drinking

This is all you need to know. He won't stop drinking.

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.