Is a heavy drinker an alcoholic? Does it even matter?

[Comtedemontecristo]

My DH drinks the weekly unit allowance every night. On non work nights it's much more. We've been together over 20 years and he's always done this. Previously it was beer. Now he adds wine and spirits but only when he's not working next day. He does control it and works out how much and how late he can drink if he has to drive the next day. He seems OK health wise though recently he seems to be having bowel issues.

Can you tell me if he's 'just' a heavy drinker or if he has a problem? Would you be worried? I don't drink so I can't guage what's normal. He says the unit limits are ridiculously low.

You can’t make him see how you’re worried about him.
He’s putting alcohol before your relationship. You need to protect yourself.

I’m amazed that his heavy drinking hasn’t impacted his health already. It will, he needs to cut right back.

He’s definitely physically addicted. I’d be very surprised if he’s not drinking earlier in the day than you think he is to stave off the withdrawals.

This will probably sound rude but it’s not meant to- but do you even know who he is? If he’s under the influence all the time? Does he even know who he is?

I’d be very concerned about his health. So many people go along fine until their liver reaches breaking point and then they’re screwed.

Have you ever spoken to him about his drinking?

OP, did you see the post about the colonoscopy?