Two bottles of wine a night. Help I think I am an an alcoholic.

[BabyBearRus]

Well, I am typically drinking 2 bottles of wine a night. Am I an alcoholic? I can't seem to last beyond two days before having wine. I have an addictive personality have previously been a smoker). I am seriously thinking about taking up smoking again so as to ditch the alcohol. Advice desperately needed

[nzeire]

Sounds like you need a bit of help with this, 2 bottles is tooooooo much! And don’t replace it with smoking!
Go and see your gp for advice on quitting or cutting down, you’re on pretty dangerous levels
Good luck

[MrsTerryPratchett]

If you drink and can't not drink, you have a drinking problem.

Taking up smoking to deal with it is a foolish and desperate idea. You'll be someone who smokes and has a drinking problem.

What do you want to do? GP, counselled, AA?

[BabyBearRus]

I really don't want to go down the GP route. Firstly, we are such a tight knit community and I know all the GP receptionists. Couldn't live with everyone knowing my business (alas our local GP receptionists known to gossip 😟).

[Notashandyta]

Can you drop to one bottle?

For now? Just have one bottle in, and go from there

[MrsTerryPratchett]

Online counselling?

[Aquamarine1029]

First of all, very well done for recognising you have a problem, and I agree. I think your drinking is a bit beyond what is healthy or reasonable. You can absolutely get a handle on this, and if you need help, please get it. As for the smoking, please don't start again. That won't help anything.

[Suzi888]

Two bottles is way too much. Have you tried any of the quit drinking apps?
Can you start drinking later and drop to one bottle initially?
How long have you been drinking this much?

[MrsTerryPratchett]

And BTW you're still drunk in the morning so no driving or doing a job that's got any safety aspects at all.

Good luck.

[BabyBearRus]

Twelve years ago I had a very traumatic experience. I started drinking far too much to cope. Up until this point I was never a big drinker. In between this time I had two children, where I abstained for the duration of pregnancy and breastfeeding. But now I have gone back to nightly, and heavy drinking.

[BabyBearRus]

Has anyone had any success with hypnosis!

[BabyBearRus]

Suzi888 I don't start drinking till 9.30. after my kids are in bed Yes I thought that this might reduce my consumption. Alas it hasn't.

[Suzi888]

The fact you quit whilst pregnant means you can do it. Didn’t realise hypnotherapy could be used to quit drinking, if you don’t want to go the G.P route, it’s worth a try.
Have you tried the usual tricks to cut back like eating dinner later, pint of water. There was a thread just after Christmas for people hoping to quit/cut back.

[MrsTerryPratchett]

@BabyBearRus

Has anyone had any success with hypnosis!

You're looking around for quick fixes. Start smoking, do hypnosis.

What I've seen work, having worked in treatment, is very hard work, groups, individual counselling, sometimes CBT or medication for underlying trauma or MH issues, and more very hard work.

You can do it, but not with a quick trick. I'm very sorry this happened to you. It's not fair but it is you that has to do the work.

[Youngatheart00]

Are you gaining weight? I gained a lot of weight when my wine consumption was high. Could vanity encourage you to cut down? Or a mix of vanity / health and being there for your kids.

Do you feel hungover in the morning?

[Bionicname]

If you think you’re an addictive personality, could you channel that part of you into a “benign” addiction? Running?

[alwayswrighty]

I've an addictive personality. I've been through cigarettes, drink, drugs and food. I exercise now (rowing machine and running) which makes me feel better and I track my calories (to stop me eating too much).

Wrt AA, etc do you happen to have private health care, or any form of life insurance/other personal insurance policy? Sometimes they have a counselling service attached.

[WhyMrsRobinson]

Hi, my understanding is that hypnosis can help with the mind set, but you still get the cravings. I’d suggest a counsellor to help you work through the issues causing you to self medicate, and start, really start saying nice things to yourself. ‘Well done me, I made a start on the washing up’, rather than,‘I’m rubbish, I’ve not washed up, I’m so stupid’. Sounds silly but it does work. I think, maybe then you wil feel more like looking after yourself and self medicating or rewarding yourself in a more useful way- a walk, bath, read. But please get a counsellor. Some will help out at a much reduced rate if you are in a bad place. Pm me if you need a recommendation.
Also don’t get thirsty or hungry!

[WhyMrsRobinson]

Sounds like I’m dissing hypnotherapy, totally go for it, amazing stuff. Also edmr

[AbsolutelyPatsy]

do you like ginger beer?
that is a popular alternative.

[LCDIT]

I would taper down very very slowly. Once you are not drinking, I wouldn't go back to having even one. It is so addictive for some people and it's only when you abstain, you have a chance of not picking up the bottle again

[groovergirl]

OP, can I suggest you find an integrative medicine clinic (ie conventionally trained doctors who also use certain naturopathic practices) and ask them to analyse your blood and stool samples? (All the better if you have to visit a different town -- away from the gossips!) Your drinking might be to do with an underlying issue such as gluten intolerance or coeliac disease. I don't mean to sound simplistic, but sometimes these addictions have a physiological cause.

In the meantime, you need something to distract you in the evenings. Can you do a yoga or pilates session? There are lots online. Promise yourself you'll do it for 30 minutes, then see how you feel. It could be that you just need to break a bad habit by replacing it with something new and interesting. (Not smoking!)

[ContinuousMonotoneBeep]

@BabyBearRus

Has anyone had any success with hypnosis!

My mother stopped drinking with hypnosis. Woild drink a similar amount as you..And much for the same reason didn't go to the gp as she didn't want people knowing her business. Sober five years now.

I think you (or most people) do need long term support to maintain sobriety. I half think my mum has maintained it because of her obsessive and addictive personality combined with the fact she is extremely concerned with saving face. (In other words she's perpetuated herself as a non-drinker so has to maintain it.

It was never widely known how much she drank, so maybe she still is just not drinking when I'm there anymore.

[NeilBuchananisBanksy]

GP receptionists aren't allowed to gossip about medical matters. It's a sackable offence.

You need support with this. If not the GP there should be some alcohol support services you can go to.

[Els1e]

I remember on another thread someone suggesting smart recovery. I think it’s a charity that support people with addiction. They said they found it better than aa.

[BabyBearRus]

Thank you for all your comments. I agree that I need to abstain from drinking rather than try to cut cut down. I do keep trying to just drink one night a week with varying results.
I have put on a lot of weight, especially in the last year when I resumed drinking after stopping breastfeeding. This obviously gets me down too.
Regarding hangovers. I rarely get them but I do generally feel tired and unfit most of the time (even when I've had a few days off the wine).
I would love to become teetotal and get the exercise bug.
I will look into smart recovery as it offers more annonimity. I have also signed up for a hypnosis programme which deals with alcohol addiction.
Desperately want to be back in control of my life. At the moment alcohol has a really strong hold over me.
Thanks again everyone x