Starting The Alcohol Experiment

[rassaz]

I'm an alcoholic and have been for a long time. I'm not in denial or anything and the amount of units I drink per week and even per day is extremely high. Also, I do mean extremely.

I come from an abusive background involving an alcoholic parent, from that got into abusive relationships. My family who I am now NC with normalised and encouraged drinking....really to enable and mollify the alcoholic. I've had terrible mental health issues all my life.

I really need to do something about this now, I am nearing 40. I have sought help over the years but it's never really worked for me. I think I need to do this by myself but I'm concerned that much of the help that I haven't tried is aimed at people drinking far less than me. I don't want to play other people's problems down at all .. that's not my point, but I am not in the 1 glass in the evening often becomes 2 bracket.

I don't feel able to go to a GP because I've had a lifetime of being messed around, incorrect records after serious cockups and general fobbing me off. I do not trust the medical profession..or really anyone at all. I have had two (unrelated) problems that have caused me absolutely terrible pain over the last 3-4 years and feel like I was just basically left to suffer. On top of everything else that's caused this it just makes me distrustful and angry.

Before the painful conditions I drank much less because I exercised. I still drank too much but that outlet was helpful.

Sorry I am rambling.

Will this program be helpful to me do you think? Does anyone have any experience of it from the heavier drinking side of things?

I think you need to seek medical advice and probably supervised detox. I don't think the alcohol experiment alone will offer you enough support. And suddenly stopping alcohol can be dangerous as I'm sure you know. I understand the appeal of trying to tackle this on your own, but you need more support than the alcohol experiment will give you. It's much more about reflection, daily meditative practices, listening to videos etc.

You sound like you're in a bad place and have really suffered. Please reach out for professional help.

I don't think you are here for pity but Jesus that's some tough breaks. I hope you find the right way. Seconding the danger of unsupervised detox. Just hoping for you.

@rassaz - firstly well done for owning this and planning on making improvements. As @KittytheHare said, going cold turkey could be dangerous. I was / am a terrible binge drinker and could get through a bottle of vodka in a day. I’m now 5 days AF after my last binge. I’ve only ever experienced mild to moderate withdrawal symptoms but if you are an every day drinker, the risk is greater. I’m getting support from an addiction nurse and she’s great - v supportive and non judgemental and I was referred via my GP. You might want to do a bit of research around tapering to reduce then stop your intake.

Try the This Naked Mind Facebook group. It is much more active than the MN threads and there will be many many people who have been in similar situations to you.

I am determined this time will be my time as I’ve really ruined family and friend relationships. But I’ve been here before then caved. I’m now taking acamprosate for cravings and it does seem to be helping.

Good luck on your journey.

Have a look at one year no beer. There is a joining fee but you get loads of support and the Facebook page is really good.

I actually don't think the name does them justice as its alcohol addiction support rather than taking a month/year off drinking.

OP I am you (abusive family and partners) but 15 years down the line. I have decided I am not doing it any more.

I would advise reading a lot of soberlit - Jason Vale and Annie Grace are good. I was on about 70 units a week at home. Obviously could be more in "normal times" if I went out. Not sure how this compares with your consumption but if it is more than that then yes it could be dangerous to just give up unaided.

@KittytheHare thank you, I did think when I looked at the initial stuff from TAE that it wasn't aimed at me really!

This is a very reflective post OP and you’ve had a seriously tough time. Annie Grace’s Alcohol Experiment is very good. I did the free version in December and have been sober since (5 months). I drank a bottle or equivalent every night plus binged every now & then. A few people on the experiment still wobble and drink occasionally, so it could be a good way to cut down, get all the information & really think things through by doing the journals etc and then stop completely. There’s no reason why you can’t do it to cut back and then again to stop completely.
There’s also ‘smart’ courses - a bit like AA but non-religious. I’ve not done these but someone else may be along to help with that.

@smartclinic Being an alcoholic is dangerous though.

Indeed.

@SummerHouse thank you.

How are you gettin on OP?

Alcohol Support