Mumsnet hasn't checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have medical concerns, please seek medical attention; if you think your problem could be acute, do so immediately. Even qualified doctors can't diagnose over the internet, so do bear that in mind when seeking or giving advice.
Mumsnet hasn't checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have medical concerns, please seek medical attention; if you think your problem could be acute, do so immediately. Even qualified doctors can't diagnose over the internet, so do bear that in mind when seeking or giving advice.
Alcohol support
DP stress drinking
Confused09876 · 23/05/2021 12:45
My DP and I have been together for about a year, our relationship is perfectly normal and functional. We drink ‘normally’ I think- he has one or two beers a couple of evenings a week and we share a couple of bottles of wine over the weekend. There is always spirits in the house, Christmas presents, leftover from parties etc, but they just stay there unless we fancy one.
DP had some bad news yesterday, a very close friend of him betrayed him over something, he was very upset.
I went out for a few hours and when I came back I could tell he was drunk. He wasn’t completely wasted, but his eyes were glassy and his speech was a bit slurred.
I asked him if he had drank and he said no, I didn’t believe him and asked him to swear he hadn’t which he did.
I couldn’t shake the feeling so I went to the cupboard and found that a third of a bottle of whisky (brand new unopened bottle from xmas) had been drank. I confronted him with it and he admitted he had drank it because he was stressed. I asked why he had lied and he said he didn’t know.
I feel totally betrayed by his lying, he slept downstairs on the sofa and we haven’t spoken this morning. I’m worried that if this is how we responds to stress we might have a longer term issue.
Has anyone experienced this? Should I trust it’s a one off or could this be a red flag?
fedup078 · 23/05/2021 20:16
The lying is more worrying than the drinking which could have been dismissed as a one off if not for the lies
You've only been together a year? But I gather you live together? How long for? It's hard to say if he has a problem or not really
ThroughThickAndThin01 · 23/05/2021 20:22
I’m not quite sure why you have been confrontational about it. You say you both drink normally. He had really bad news. You interrogated him about drinking. I don’t get it.
minty133 · 23/05/2021 20:24
I think you've been a bit hard on him and it sounds like a one-off. What didn't you talk to him about why he's upset instead of judging him?
amylou8 · 23/05/2021 20:26
I wouldn't have an issue at all with this as a one off. A pretty understandable reaction to something tough happening. The lying isn't on, but maybe he realised you'd respond badly.
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.