Kicking myself so badly. I stopped drinking for ages and in the last few days it's all gone to shit. Straight back to not being able to remember chunks of time, having horrific anxiety, not being able to figure out what was a dream and what was reality.
Shame, guilt, horror, anxiety - all of the things I haven't really felt for months and months.
I am hiding away at home in a dark room to get through the first couple of days.
I feel awful, really, really awful.
Why the hell did I do that?