DH is an alcoholic. His drinking has escalated in the past three years. He keeps trying to get sober, but relapses monthly. Recently he told me he was trying to not drink for a year (almost like a test to himself to see he is in control of his drinking?), and then seeing what happens. He told me if it doesn't work, he will go to counselling.
I knew he would not last, but let him do his thing - and sure enough, after less than two months, he drank again. This time he had backed himself into a corner, and he was forced to follow through with his promise, and get help.
He's been going to a local alcohol counselling service once a week (except the two weeks when we were on holiday), but has not been going to group meetings or other therapies. He also told me he uses cocaine when he drinks. He was very adamant that he wanted to quit, but to me, he doesn't make enough effort.
Tonight, again, he is out and still hasn't come home. I knew this would happen. It's barely been three weeks since the last relapse and I'm getting tired.
We have two very young children and I'm pregnant again (please don't tell me what a mistake this is), and I feel trapped. I'm a SAHM and have no way of moving out. I want to leave - even for a few days to show DH that I will not tolerate this anymore - but have no family or friends who can take me and the kids in. Our apartment is provided by DH's employer, and I have no way of paying rent if I leave. I feel so lost and I don't know what to do. I can't stay here and face his inevitable apologies in the morning, but have nowhere to go.