Lonely Alco

[MyDearFriendAlcohol]

So. I don't really know where to start or where the beginning really is. I have had drug addictions which I now feel are firmly in the past and once that was curbed the good old booze began to take over. I would drink until I was drunk every night and wake up with a hangover everyday all whilst hiding it from friends and family (just like the drugs) and maintaining a career. I found out I was pregnant, had one last glass of wine and moved in with my partner. Now I have had my baby (4months) I have gradually built up to having a glass of wine everyday. I think all day about what would be the earliest acceptable time to have that glass. Tonight my partner was not home until late so I knew I could have a glass drunk before he came home and have a fresh one poured when he arrived to pretend it was my first. I have now just sent him to bed and trying so hard to resist that third glass. Trying to resist incase I get found out, not for any other reason. If I have a third I would definitely need to top the wine bottle up with water or he'll notice. I am so scared I am slipping into my old habits and I don't know how to stop.

MyDear you poor thing. I'm afraid I have nothing constructive to contribute but didn't want to read your post and run - you sound quite tortured. I wish you some useful replies and support, and all the best. The fact that you're 'observing' from outside as well as feeling the cravings from inside, plus the desire to avoid where you've been before, is surely positive? xx

Regret seems to be part of the cycle but it's not enough to break me free. But thank you, it's nice to know someone is listening x

So are you saying regret is why you are drinking. Put the past behind you....you have so much going for you NOW so don't jeopardise it by drinking....nothing worse than drinking because of the past....I know have done this for years and nothing good will come of it....be strong and concentrate on what you have NOW as that is what matters. If you have given up drugs then you can def stop drinking. Stop buying drink and keeping it at home it's to tempting if you are feeling down. You can do it..you are a strong woman....good luck

Please search for 'The Brave Babes Battlebus' the current thread is subtitled 'Go sober for October' lots of advice and support on there. You're not alone at all.

Thank you, I will.

Mydearfriend alcohol. I haven't seen you on the bravebabes thread and don't know how to link to it here but just wanted to say I am thinking of you and there are lots of people over there waiting to support you.

Thank you holdthewine, I really appreciate the thoughts. I didn't have the third glass yesterday and have had nothing so far today. Taking it a day at a time! I will pop over to that thread and introduce myself. Thanks again x

When I had small children I avoided alcohol completely because we live in a rural location and I always thought what if I needed to drive them for medical help. Once or twice I did too, when they got a temperature and the helpline said pop them to the minor injuries.

Could you stop drinking in order to give yourself that flexibility. You don't need wine really but you think you do because it's become the norm.