Getting the ball rolling - support for my father

[maisquefaire]

Hi,

I've name changed because whatever my shrink says I'm still not getting that empowering feeling from saying "My father's an alcoholic".

I'll try to be as short and concise as possible, but I have a feeling this is going to be long, apologies in advance.

I'm 27, I live abroad as does my elder sister who is 29.

My sister remains in contact with him but I haven't seen him since I was about 13 as I just found it too painful.

My father is an alcoholic in his late fifties. He has been drinking since I was little so at least 20 years.

He has been out of work and drinking for the last 22 years ( We think he had a breakdown when he divorced my mother, he worked in financial services in the city beforehand).

My father broke his wrist last week, probably in a drunken fall. He is in hospital. From what he tells my sister he is not eating properly and his apartment is in a state.

We know he needs help, but from abroad and with limited knowledge of the UK social services system, we do not know where to start.

We do not know where to start, as he has always been very cagey about even telling my sister what benefits he is on.

He lives in the south east.

Where should we start, and who can we contact for help with him?

Many Thanks

No one ? I've written to the multi agency safeguarding hub of his council but not had a reply ...

Sorry you are going through this. My father was also an alcoholic. Does he accept that he is an alcoholic? Is willing to go into detox?

Hi OP, so sorry to hear this. I'm a recovering alcoholic myself. Does your father have any interest in stopping? Also, whereabouts in the South East? I know of an organisation in Kent which he could be referred to and I'm sure that similar exist in other areas. Has he ever or would he attend AA? It can be very comforting hearing other people speak "your language" for the first time, and to hear the dark places that people have been in, yet have come through the other side.

There's a helpline for AA: 0800 9177 650.

Sending you

Try this link. Feel free to PM me.

www.changegrowlive.org/get-help/find-a-service

Thank you.

My father is near Sevenoaks.

Apparently, he's not quite there yet in recognising that he has an alcohol problem. However, he has been staying with my sister this week and she has organised for someone for AA to come round, and my father seems to be engaging with them. So we will try and continue along that line when he gets back.

Thankyou.