I am a mum of 3 young boys, full time manager in a very stressful career and for the last ten or more years have drank heavily. Easily a bottle of wine a night and moving swiftly on to G&Ts (6 a night). Waking up every morning feeling ashamed, bloated, guilty, anxious. I would drink to the point of oblivion, often passing out fully clothed on the sofa and waking up to flashbacks of feminist or political ranting at whomever would listen (mostly my poor husband).
I would swear I wouldn’t drink tonight and then come 5pm after a hectic day would pour a glass and the cycle repeated.
That is until yesterday morning when I woke up and realised I had wet the bed. I was (and still bloody am!) absolutely mortified! 
I was so drunk I became unconscious and wet myself. That pure, honest SHAME has now kick started my sobriety. I have to stop, I have no control over how much I drink, I just keep going. It's making me fat, ashamed, unlike able and a liability. Plus it horrifies me that one of my children might need me in the night and I am too off my tits to be a responsible Mum. That's too scary to think about.
I didn’t drink yesterday or today (it's only 2.30pm but it counts). I’ve done one and a half days. But I am focused on beating this. I have to do it, I have to feel proud of myself again and I have to think of my health and my responsibility to my children.
I have a neighbour round for drinks tonight and I have gone and bought a bottle of alcohol free wine and am focussing instead on cooking some nice nibbles. I'm feeling strong about this, a little anxious though...it's a strange concept to have someone over for drinks and not drink drink. I don't know how to answer the question when people will inevitably ask about why I am not drinking....? Should I be honest and say I need to stop, I have no control, I have to get myself back or is it easier to be the one to drive or be on antibiotics or some other excuse? How do other people handle this?