What makes you an alcoholic? Think maybe I might be one.

[hellowinter]

Love white wine, binge drink at the weekends, i look forward to it during the week (when I don't drink), and save it up for a binge to... well, I don't really know why. Life pretty hard lately but generally feel happier and stronger on the whole. So don't really have an excuse.
Feel imprisoned by it's lure...
help!

By binge what do you mean? How many nights a week alcohol free.

Bottle and a half usually on a binge. Could do more but feel sick so have to stop. Then aboout 3 or 4 nights a week booze free.
Looking forward more and more to 'drink' nights, which I guess is the thing that is really concerning me.

Just to add, on a week night I usually only have 2 or 3 glasses, if I have succummed and open a bottle. I could never just have one and be happy.
Then on the weekend it's like 'ahh, yay' lets open a bottle and just go for it, I've been waiting for this all week. Which is worrying.

I feel addicted to the stuff

hellowinter They say that it's not the amount you drink but why you drink that is the question as regards alcohol dependence. For me drinking was about getting drunk and numbing emotions and like you I could never just have one. I was never physically addicted but definitely emotionally or psychologically addicted. Pop over to the Dry thread here and you'll find lots of us having these kinds of discussions :)

I think the 'I could never have just one' is a sign that your current relationship with alcohol is not a healthy one. I would also suspect (a) you're being generous with how many booze-free nights you're actually managing and (b) you are using them deliberately to make yourself feel like you don't have an alcohol problem, if you see what I mean. God knows, no judgement from me - I reckon I probably had about 5 alcohol-free nights in five years, if that.

I would take a month off to give yourself a chance to evaluate what you feel about alcohol. It's long enough to feel some of the benefits of not drinking but not so daunting that it feels like it's not even worth trying. Good luck - this could be the best thing you ever do for yourself.

Fuck it, just drink when you need to

Too much over analysis on some threads.

When I have a bad day I seek alcohol, on a good day I can't be bothered!

Horses for courses!!

That's helpful jane

Don't focus on the phrase 'alcoholic' - I find it profoundly unhelpful because so many people think of the image of some unwashed down-and-out in a dirty mac sleeping rough. And that allows us to say 'well, that's not me'.

You have recognised that your relationship with alcohol is not a good one.
Trust that feeling and act on it.
It does not sound like you are physically dependent (no shakes in the morning, no sweats, no need for 'hair of the dog', no withdrawal seizures etc), so the problem comes down to why you drink and how much you drink when you do.

Have a look at the FAST test here or the more comprehensive AUDIT test linked to on the page.

The key thing here is that you are not comfortable with what you are doing wrt alcohol, so make some changes. Seek help and support, your GP can be a good source of information

This topic is 'Alcohol Support'. The OP is concerned about how much she is drinking.

However, maybe it's worth remembering no-one ever needs to drink, jane? The majority of the world's population don't drink at all.

Anybody who has run in to problems when drinking alcohol is a 'problem drinker', whether physically dependent or not.
If the OP perceives a problem, there likely IS a problem.

If I drank when I "needed" to, Jane, I would do myself some serious damage.

I think you're psychologically dependent, OP. You really enjoy it, and therefore want to do it even though you know you probably shouldn't.

hello winter apols should have put 'how often you drink, not how much'!! And yes agreed with OP Jane that if I drank when I needed to I'd be permanently p*ssed which is why I stopped! Alcohol is addictive and some of us don't have the luxury of some days not being bothered by it

I'm the same, I drink as I find it relaxes me and I do look forward to the night time to open a bottle and relax when the children are in bed.