Does the craving for alcohol ever go away?

[mawbroon]

Next week will be 10 years since I touched a drop of alcohol.

I had been problem drinking for around 16 years and stopped cold turkey as soon as I became pregnant with DC1. I didn't intend to stop forever, but as time went on, I didn't fancy having drink thrown into the mix with the sleep deprivation and all the other shit that comes with having a newborn.

Fast forward to a few weeks ago, I was cooking something in the slow cooker and decided to put some red wine in. DH usually has a bottle on the go (he is extremely moderate) but on this occasion he didn't. I took a new bottle and opened it. Unusually, it was a cork rather than a screw top and something about going through the motions of cutting the foil, and taking out the cork must have awoken some old memories. It was 9am and I absolutely could have drunk some of the wine despite the fact it was 9am.

Same happened this morning. I was making fruit cake and when I opened the brandy to add to the mix, the smell was so delicious that again, in the morning, I absolutely could have enjoyed drinking some.

Why is this happening now? Like I say, it's almost 10 years. I don't trust myself to ever drink moderately, so I have to stay off it. Also I now take medication that I can't drink with.

How can a craving still be so powerful after so long? I am beginning to worry that I don't trust myself. I can't risk even having one

Hi Op, I don't speak from personal experience, as I do consider myself one of the lucky ones who can have a drink but not a drink problem... If that makes sense.

However, my brother died of an addiction and I have two close family members who are recovering alcoholics, and one thing they all say / said is that the craving never goes away... And that it just takes one slip up for you to be back where you started.

"One drink is too many but 100 is never enough", is often said of alcoholics, and I believe this to be true having witnessed this awful illness closely...

Could you seek support from AA or another peer support group? 16 years sober is great, and some support from those who have been where you have been will help you have 16 more :-).

Good luck!!!!

Don't read too much into this op. It's easy to over analyse.

Just take it for what it is, a memory. Doesn't mean you have to act on it.

It's not like you book a holiday every time you smell suntan lotion is it?

Acknowledge it, and move on with your day. Just like you do when you smell that suntan lotion!

Maybe you are feeling a bit low, bored, stressed etc - more vulnerable than ususal? Be strong and koko.