7 years ago...

[misspollysdolly]

Just sharing really. 7 years ago yesterday our adopted DD moved in with us . As is traditional here(!), we didn't especially mark the day - the period that immediately followed that day was a pretty tough one and every year that we have tried to make a bit of a fuss, DD has behaved in a very challenging way further reminding us that life has not always been straight forward, so a few years ago we decided that it was a bit to painful to do that really ( Goodness that sounds a bit negative, doesn't it?!) as it didn;t seem to benefit any of us, individually or together. Anyhoo, it is still a milestone, we are still altogether (later joined by our lovely boys) and we are mostly pretty happy. I just thought I'd let you know, as you guys - more than most - will probably understand.

Congratulations!
Its 8 years since ds arrived and we found it best to 'go with the flow' so we dont make a fuss either.
Milestone it certainly is.

Fancy meeting you here, Magso! Thanks!

congratulations - 7 years of ups and downs andmarking such a major event in all your lives is worth a silent glass raised to the gods (IMVHO!). Even if you choose to downplay it. Still a milestone, as you say.

I am relieved we are not the only ones who dont celebrate. It will be 7 years since I first met my DS on the 16th and bought him home from the family courts. In March it will be 5 years since the adoption went through. To my shame the dates often pass without me even noticing. Life has just been so frantic since those days (not just down to DS I must add!)

DD was terminally ill at the time of the adoption day. I met my OH and DSs at the court and then went back to the hospital and they went home. Not what I had planned when we decided to adopt

Thank God we met him and kept him. He helped my DD when she was sick and loving him and his brother helped me get through the years following DD's death.

Thank God (or whoever you would like to thank ) for our wonderful children and the joy and challenges they bring us.

Best wishes to you and your family misspolly

I suppose so maryz . But apart from DD's death I can see how much we have gained from all the madness that has occoured in our lives.

It does make you stronger, dealing with stuff that comes out of the blue. Adoption certainly brings a lot of that 'stuff' into our lives!

The joy and heartache thing is so true. So many conflicting emotions.

I really think that I'm a better/nicer/more thoughful person as a result of adopting (and the difficulties that necessitated it!). I wouldn;t say that to anyone except adopters becasue I think it sounds twee, but learning to live with and love a child that isn't genetically yours and to accept that your moments of joy have come at someone elses expense (including your DC's) does help you to appreciate the good times when they happen and keeps some of the niggles in perspective (sometimes!)

As a birth mum can I just say I always remember that day too.

Nineteen years for me and not only do I remember her birthday but the day four months later that it all became "official" for her new family.