EOTAS can mean whatever you want it to mean really and it can change over time. We did EHE because it happened in a hurry and although we had EHCP already well in place no one mentioned EOTAS - funny that!
When we went back to school, 4 years later, we actually did flexi school with EOTAS (as by then I had discovered we were legally entitled to 15 hours a week of tutoring). At that point we had 3 days school and 2 days EOTAS - of which 3 hours was English tutoring.
I would say, do not officially de-register until you have a final EHCP in place.
Therapy can be part of EOTAS - make sure it is in Section F of the EHCP.
Anyway, to EHE... as stated, this happened in a hurry due to ill health caused by stress (at age 8).
Overnight, child to parent violence stopped.
Regulation was still an issue but I could be pro-active and completely change my planned activities for the day by just assessing how the day was going by the time we were up and dressed. That flexibility was key to staying more regulated - and the longer those patches of regulation became, the more ready to learn (and I don't just mean academically).
We spent a lot of time outside in nature. We walked or cycled miles whatever the weather (and that was regulating in itself).
We did need structure, so we had English, Maths and 'Topic' lessons every day - but there was no fixed timetable and a topic on Animals could include playing Animal I spy in the local park.
It was tough. An exhausting, unrelenting grind every day. But it changed their life and I could suddenly see a future for them where they could be part of society and manage a reasonably 'normal' life (which had not seemed even a distant hope before then).
We struggled with home education groups (for many reasons - partly because we didn't fit the mould even there), but we must have been 2 years or more in before we even tried those. We did find one that sort of worked for us and was very practical.
I knew nothing about Home education when I started, but soon learned there were many different theories - and a lot of heavy advice about 'unschooling'. That would not have worked for us though. We needed structure and they also very much needed to know I was in charge and leading the plans (but they were child led and responsive to their need).
I didn't try to stick with the National Curriculum, although there are lots of resources for it out there if you want to.
We needed far more early years style learning and a huge amount of relationship/attachment learning. We played games together every day. We baked together regularly, we went to the library twice a week. Lots and lots of stuff just us together initially, then slowly widening out to museum visits - when it was lovely and quiet on school days (with the occasional noisy and dysregulated herd of school children passing by).
We worked on a lot of general knowledge and understanding of the world. I felt like a narrator at times, explaining evwrything we saw, 'Oh look, that little girl in the pram is really cross because she wanted to carry on walking, but her Mummy is being a safe and sensible Mummy by making sure she can't run into the road again...' (because they just had no idea of how to intepret the world and everything was scary or confusing).
It became such a habit that at times I even narrated my own life to myself, 'Oh look, Mummy is flopping into the armchair exhausted after having spent 3 hours getting you to bed. Mummy needs to take care of herself because that's very important.' I swear I was very close to complete breakdown at times!
Seeing my child standing perfectly still for probably half an hour, watching in fascination as a pair of foxes worked collaboratively to try and get a meal, and then hearing them excitedly tell people over the next week how amazing it was and remembering all the details, in order and with awareness of their listener... that type of moment made it worth all the stress, all the battles, all the fear of them falling (even further) behind academically and the sheer utter exhaustion of it all.
I would probably change some things I did now, hopefully having learned a few things along the way - but I would definitely recommend it to anyone if school is impacting home life, security and stability in the way it was for us. I believe it changed our trajectory.
There is a book which has a section written by an adopter who was home educating, printed by Coram I think. Part of the 'Parenting a child who struggles with...' series. Our therapist had the books in their waiting room!
Happy to answer any questions as I have probably missed important stuff in my rambling.