Thinking about what our children's lives nearly werey were

[Countryspaniel]

I met with our three children's older siblings today. We were watching them all play at a farm park. 5 kids under 9 years old in total.

It really caught me today seeing my precious three babies (1, 3, 4) and thinking what a rubbish life they wpuld have had if they hadn't been adopted. It's really got me, thinking of how much those children deserve and In a sliding doors, life could have been so different.

I think I can relate to what you're saying, though I'm a foster carer not an adopter. Over the years I have fostered numerous children who had birth siblings who had less happy outcomes than them. Our current foster children are from a sibling group of eight ranging from 15 months to 16 years in age. The 15 month old is going to be placed for adoption soon, the older ones are mostly in long term foster care except for one who had a different Dad who has gone to live with his paternal grandma.
Obviously there are wonderful long term carers out there and also heroic kinship carers who step in at a point in their life when they thought they were just about to retire to Spain (real example) but it is tougher for older children who had been left in a neglectful or abusive birth family for way too long compared to their little siblings who were removed at birth.
Without knowing your children's circumstances or who the siblings live with it does seem a positive thing that you're able to meet up with them.

Thank you so much for sharing your perspective. I really admire the work you do as a foster carer—it’s such an important role and not an easy one. I agree that older children often face tougher challenges, but keeping those sibling connections alive is so valuable. For me, the ups and downs of fostering sometimes feel a bit like run 3—full of twists and obstacles—but at the end of the day, it’s about helping the children move forward with more stability and hope.

I think the same, often, OP.