To search for long lost adoptee or not?

[SunshineLollipops9]

I don’t want to go in to too much detail as it would be very outing, but as a family we are conflicted.

My Auntie had a baby in the late 1970’s that we believe was a forced adoption, or one she felt pressured in to. The younger generation didn’t find out about this until many years later. I have a strong suspicion it was my grandmother that pressured her in to having her baby adopted. I also believe my Auntie planned to tell her children once our grandmother died, but she died before her.

We are now not sure what to do. We would so much like to find her and hope she is healthy, well and had a good adoption. To also honour our aunties memory. She never got over the adoption and was in deep pain. However, we’re not sure if it’s best to not try and find her. Perhaps if she wanted to be found, she would have found us by now and this may be a sign that she had a good adoption and has loving parents.

if you are an adult adoptee of the 50’s/60’s/70’s did you want to be found? Do you have any advice?

Thank you

@SunshineLollipops9

Im not an adoptee and it's not for me to speak on adoptees behalf but I imagine adoptees reasons for looking for birth family or not are very individual and often complex.
Your birth relative may have had a good adoption and dont want to upset their parents. They may also not want go throw a bomb into the lives of their birth mum.
There are intermediaries who can contact your relative for you which gives them the opportunity to decide in their own time if they want contact.
That could be the way forward for you