Panel

[Thedandyanddude]

I'm going to matching panel in a few weeks. I'm hoping people will be able to give me an insight into the questions asked at theirs? I'm very nervous and I've been awake most nights with questions going around and around in my head.

I know I probably won't get the same questions but I'm hoping I might get a feel for the vibe.

Many thanks

If you have/have had any health or mental health stuff, they will ask you about that and how you will manage if things get worse. E.g. I have had depression in the past, so we had a question about how I would manage if I had a relapse, so I talked about reaching out ahead of time, asking for support from family, etc. Our SW also got us to prep an answer about the impact of the internet in future years e.g. be proactive in researching parental controls, not assume it won't change, etc.

I found that the questions didn’t vary much from what was asked at approval panel and by our LO’s social worker. There was definitely a theme in what weaknesses people were seeing in our PAR.
So maybe look back over those, and of course expect some questions relating to your match.
It’s all so nerve wracking. Best of luck to you x

There is often a question about why this child/children specifically, so you may want to think through why you were drawn to them, and why it's a good match.

If your child has any specific characteristics this tends to take over panel. For example my youngest is disabled so this was talked about A LOT! Or for example if your child is a different ethnicity or from a different culture to you.

Relax and enjoy it, mine felt quite celebratory.

HI @Thedandyanddude

As its matching panel you are likely to be asked why this child, how you understand their needs and how you think you can meet their needs.
Remember you wouldn't be going to panel if the child's SW didnt think you were right for their child.
Good luck - let us know how you get on

Ah exciting!

Re-read your PAR the day before so you know exactly what they have read about you.
Be clear in your head about why this is the right match for you.
They are going to want to hear your excitement for the match but also sensible and realistic views about support you may need and what you would do if the child isn't what your expecting later down the line.

Best of luck.

We were asked about how we planned to manage a health issue I have when dc joined us.
Other questions (I think there were only 3 or 4) were more general - why do you think X is the right child for you/you’re the right parents for X type thing.
Last question was a nice 2 part one - what are you most looking forward to and what do you hope your family will look like/be doing in a year.

Advice from me - have an answer ready for any weaknesses/concerns you’ve worked through with your social worker.
If you’re adopting as a couple, make sure both of you speak and answer the questions.
Focus on the fact that these people want to say yes, they’re just reaffirming the information they already have about you.

Good luck OP.

Thank you so much everyone, these are fantastic.

@Needaholiday21 good catch regarding reading my par again

The "why this child" is a tricky one without sounding sentimental. Will have to speak with my head and not my heart.

I would say you can mix heart and head a little bit when responding to that question.
I think we said what we were looking/the limits we had for matching and how dc met all this (head) then said now we’ve seen photos/know more about cheeky personality etc, it’s just confirmed the match for us (heart).

@Thedandyanddude

I agree with @FinallyMummy . You need both heart and head.
The panel want to see a real person who has connected on some level with the child - but not someone carried away by the emotion, someone who has really thought about what the child needs and whether they can provide it