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Adoption

Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on adoption.

Adoption Support Fund

3 replies

Jigglypufff · 11/02/2025 20:18

Has anyone known the adoption support fund pay for things like a parent living somewhere else for a little while?

Basically, my husband is going through secondary trauma parenting our just turned 9 year old.

I was so close to asking him to leave over the summer because he can't seem to parent our son as he needs to be parented. I love my husband, but ultimately I care about my child more. He needs a parent that can keep it together. I'm not saying he has to be perfect. But he can't seem to stop shouting at small things or getting personally offended when I son says things like "you're a liar". My husband keeps complaining that our kid "talks to him like shit" but then he doesn't always speak to him in a calm way.

Don't get me wrong, my son can be tricky. He has suspected adhd, being assessed through post adoption support and my husband is doing a course through asf as well. They don't start til April and he is drowning now.

I just keep thinking this would be easier on my own. My boy is so lush and funny and can be very loving, but he just doesn't want to show it. He's getting there though.

Sorry for the rant. I feel like I'm in the mud, I want to make things better for everyone. But I'm carrying the whole families emotional well being. Spinning a lot of plates and I'm so so tired.

Basically would the asf help with temporary alternative housing costs to try and let us work on our relationship. I know this would be dysregulating for our boy, but would it be better in the long run. Any ideas or words of kindness would be appreciated.

OP posts:
Bundlesoffuntoday · 11/02/2025 21:01

That sounds so tough. Sorry to hear you are all struggling so much. Sadly I don’t think the ASF would fund that. There are also concerns that it won’t be renewed going forward. Would it be worth checking whether you are eligible for an adoption allowance?

Ted27 · 11/02/2025 21:39

Hi @Jigglypufff

Sorry to hear that it's coming to this.
The ASF funds a specific set of therapies and wouldn't cover something like this.
Do you get DLA for your son - not that it's a quick source of funds
Are there any relatives he could stay with?

Jigglypufff · 11/02/2025 22:42

We do get DLA. We could look to use this to fund some of it.

There are no family/friends he could stay with.

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