Kinship foster care

[CheeryUmberFinch]

Hi can anybody help me I'm currently going through kinship assessment for my nephew I've passed everything but I recently got an acro back with my husband's record on it and it says he was arrested on ABH but no further action and also arrested with a deadly weapon intent to harm which has awful allegations from an ex best friend also no further action. it was his first time ever being arrested on anything like this and hasn't happened since it was 9 years ago now it's coming to bite us I'm just absolutely terrified that this is gonna stop us getting him home none of my other family members can get kinship of him so if we don't he's in foster care forever they said they want to force adoption him out can someone help 🙏🏻

Hi. It won't necessarily stop you but be prepared for him to have a lot of additional scrutiny. I know someone who stole a motorbike as a teenager and so had a criminal record. He was able to show how he had learnt from the experience, would be well placed to help a teenager going down the same path etc. It was touch and go but he got through in the end. Main thing is to own up to what happened and show how he has changed, has learned from it etc

Those are pretty serious arrests even if no further action. As a social worker I'd want him to be very honest about the circumstances of both incidents, not minimising or telling half the truth. The fact it was a long time ago (and presumably hasn't been in trouble since) goes in your favour as does the tendency to try and place children within their family circle so try not to worry.

From the way you were speaking, it sounded almost like a surprise that it came back with that on, or that you were shocked it would come up. If it was a complete surprise, was that because you didn't know about all the charges?

You could consider selecting your references from your husband's side to reflect how he has changed, and to give his side of the story clearly and fairly. It would also help if you were able to show what tangible actions you have made to change- maybe a change in friendships, going to therapy, altering any tool carrying habits (so they are in the back of his van or the boot locked away when he travels so there can be no misunderstanding, taken straight into the house and only used when necessary, locked in a garage, whatever) to clarify that even if he was innocent, he understands that the interpretation of his actions was threatening and so he has taken material action to avoid these tricky situations and could speak to your nephew about practical solutions.