Yeah, we were both teachers and they wanted to know that we wouldn't be disappointed if our kids didn't achieve in the same way as other kids did, or the way we expected them to. Lots of people really value education above most other things. I remember reading a whole debate about whether someone should be penalised for planning send his adopted daughter to private school like he did his bio daughters, and that raising questions about whether he truly understood the attachment needs of his child. I'm not saying he didn't, but I thought it was an interesting dilemma- equality Vs proximity, which would have the most impact on an adopted child?
In something more close to home, a couple we were on training with were determined that their children would all go to the local Catholic school (we have plenty of local options), and when asked why, they could only say that they were Catholic, and that was the most important thing. However, I think the social workers were possibly looking to see that they understood the level of SEND that their child may have, and know that any potential parents had thought about how schools could really support them with that, rather than a simple dogmatic 'im Catholic so will send my kids to Catholic school come hell or high water' type attitude. In comparison, we had researched our local primaries and secondaries, read their ofsteds, looked at which ones had an SEND base, whether they followed trauma informed practice, checked their behaviour policy, looked up their GCSE results for send kids and their LAC and PLAC policies and looked up the racial make up of their staffing.
To us school is more than just academic achievement, and we know that our kids may struggle to access traditional education the older they get because of their emotional needs, but they can achieve a lot in things that aren't necessarily on the curriculum, so it is important to us that school does all that for us.
We also have done things like refuse to over teach them or school them despite knowing the curriculum inside out, because it just adds pressure onto our relationship. Our kids are doing just fine academically so far, and could probably excel if we were to push them, but the emotional cost of doing so would ruin everything else we were trying to build. It's more important to me that we are calm and regulated at home than we are excellent at our phonics!
The social workers wanted to know what our experiences of school were and how we would support our child if they were different, which is a bloody valid question for two academically able quiet women who adopted two very energetic and defiant boys who are already showing some difficulty accessing education due to extreme levels of sass and/or negative interactions with other kids. However, I supported my brother throughout his education, and both of my siblings had vastly different educational experiences but are successful in different ways, so it has provided me a blueprint for how I can help my children if they deviate from traditional academia.
Finally, they were interested in what we had studied and how that linked into adoption. My degree and masters were quite pertinent as they were all about language development, advocacy and identity, and we spoke extensively about how that influenced how I felt about supporting my child's identity.
Anyway, thats just some food for thought.