L.O (4) had a medical procedure recently requiring a day in hospital. He is fine and dandy now, but we had to warn the staff about his temperament and outbursts because it can be quite volatile and I didn't want a member of staff to accidentally get a fist in the face because they thought it would be calming to lean in and try to good naturedly soothe him. Health and safety and all that. We pre warned them about him being adopted, separation anxiety, medical conditions, picky eating, so on and so forth. There were whole conversations about how to manage it, and generally it was quite well managed.
However, I was struck by how many times on the day we were very casually and publically asked about the circumstances of his birth- was it vaginal or c section, info about his heel prick test, etc etc, as well as birth mothers general health, which is relevant to us because of the FASD potential but had been discussed in detail prior to that with the consultant. Like, to me knowing that isn't something that should be found out as you are scrubbing up... right? Would it impact on the care you were about to give him? If so why was this not communicated to you or the team earlier? If not, then.... why ask at that moment? I figure it must have a purpose but I don't really know why. I don't think it is a criticism, but I also don't know how I feel about it. I'm processing lol. I did wonder, are the doctors just trying to make slightly awkward conversation because they are questions nervous mums can answer because they have answered them a million times over? Like, as a teacher you often ask how the kid finds their homework at home, you don't really care about the answer but it gives you a chance to open up a conversation about the kid not doing any homework for weeks, or a hairdresser asking how your holiday was. Like conversational fillers, habits?
Anyway, I guess my question for you lovely lot is this: is there an age at which this information becomes less relevant? Like, I don't remember being asked about that when I went in for an operation when I was 14, it was all about my own bodily experience and so by my reckoning somewhere in the next 10 years we won't have to recount this information because it won't be medically necessary. Nobody is asking a 35 year old bloke how he entered into the world because there are bigger fish to fry. However, it would be nice to know roughly when that might be or when I can safely tell the doctors that if it really that relevant they can bloody well check his notes before a loud chat on a public ward and to please stop adding an extra layer of trauma to a situation when he is currently climbing the walls and ramming the little tykes cars into the oxygen cannister under the bed as he screams incomprehensibly about needles and not being left alone.
To clarify, i wasn't offended or upset, just a bit surprised. If it is relevant or pertinent, I don't have a problem proffering the information, but at some point surely something else takes precedent in the hierarchy of questioning? Maybe puberty? I dunno. Any relevant experience or comments welcomed.