All my bags are packed, I'm ready to go...

[Kewcumber]

I'm standing here outside your door.....

Cos' Ah'm LEEVING on a jet plane...

This was one of my first posts on MN 17 years ago (roughly) when I was invited to Kazakhstan to find who became DS and I'm revisiting to see if anyone remembers it as, my lovely boy is 18 on Wednesday.

EIGHTEEN !😱

Anyone remember it? I wonder if it's even still there.

I wasn't around then!

Congratulations to you and your new adult @Kewcumber

I was around. You have been inspiring.

Eighteen! I can't believe it. Well done Kew.

Wowzers! Eighteen - after 17 years together. And you still seem to have your sanity intact?! 😅Happy birthday, not-so-mini-Kewcumber. I hope you have a lovely day of celebrations planned? Any tips for those of us struggling in the mid-teens mire?

Not so mini indeed, taller than me now! And I’m no short arse.

my advice is to read Thd Teenage Brain so that when you’ve finished shrieking at each other you can remind yourself that they’re not deliberately trying to destroy your/their life, they are just trying to distance themselves from you as a part of growing up and becoming independent. Or cryovac yourself and set the defrost function for 10 years.

You must have a mini adult yourself now Ted?

OMG THERES AN EDIT FUNCTION?! When did an edit function appear!

That’s so kind of you Cat, though the idea of my slightly chaotic wonky life inspiring anyone is slightly funny. It’s all got even more chaotic and wonky after a significant accident a couple of years ago so wouldn’t be in the slightest inspiring these days 😁

You’ve been cryovac’d for far too long! You should have set your defrost button a year or so earlier. (This is the best adoption advice anyone has ever given me. It should be funded by the ASF. We can all be defrosted when our kids are 18, like your very handsome young man!)

Seriously, you look so proud in that latter photo - and so you should. The baby photo is devastatingly heartbreaking. Well done, mum: enjoy your champagne on your son’s big day. Sending you love and best wishes.

Do you know one of the nice things about not being at the birth is that his birthday can be just about him so no congratulations necessary for me! I am so proud of him, he often chooses a hard path to walk, can’t learn any way except the hard way and still has many years of maturing left in him but my god the boy is a testament to hardy genes (26 week, 980gr preemie) and a ferocious spirit which makes life a wild ride at times.

WouldN’t have it any other way now. Many many years ago on MN a prospective adopter asked anxiously whether it was possible to have a “normal” life if you adopt. I think my response at the time (and still would be now) was that our life was indeed “normal”, it was just our kind of normal!

@Kewcumber

I do indeed have a mini adult, 19, in his first year at Worcester University, passed his driving test and has a car!
Im now full time fostering and have a very challenging 12 year old with me

Man alive you are a glutton for punishment! Can’t say it hasn’t crossed my mind but I’m mildly disabled after an accident so the past few years have been a challenge and I’m probably owed some calmer waters if DS plays ball!

Ahhh how lovely. I remember reading your threads when I was first thinking of adopting about 10 years ago. It’s so lovely to hear how well you’re both doing. Bloody well done!

edited: I’m so sorry, I didn’t see the last update about your accident. Hope you’re doing well!

@Kewcumber I'm sorry about your accident. Am I right in recalling you had a big loss during your parenting, as well? You've done amazingly well, especially if your own health isn't great.

It can be easy to forget that we have real affects on the people in the phone/internet! I read your threads through research, and approval.

Congratulations, mini Kew.

@Kewcumber so sorry to hear about your accident: you are so brave and very inspirational.

@Catleveltired gosh yes well remembered. I lost my mother 10minutes/5 years/1000 years ago (depending on how I feel that day!). It was a difficult period for us both but she left a legacy in parenting to fall back on. Then I met my current other half about 3 years ago during lockdown which was a different challenge for us all, then a couple of years ago I had a freak accident (hit by a dog, yes indeedy a dog) and snapped my leg 90 degrees sideways and rotated it so 3 of 4 main knee ligaments severed, cartilage torn and pulled out of knee capsule. It was all very dramatic, reset on third attempt in a field, blue lit to hospital with no pulse in foot.

i never did do things by half.

Cue 6 months in hospital bed in living room followed by operation to attempt to reconstruct the knee by very clever Ortho types who thought I was extremely interesting.

then I learnt to walk again.

And now I can walk again (somewhat gammy-ly) although my promising career as a gymnast is in tatters.

There you go - that’s the last 5 years in a nutshell 😁

And in true Kewcumber style I blogged about it! https://surelyitshouldntbethatcomplicated.wordpress.com/2023/08/03/things-i-have-done-that-you-really-should-try-not-to-the-knee/

@Kewcumber have you ever considered stand-up as a late career? You are bloody funny! (Off to read the blog).

@Kewcumber I’m back, having read the blog. You are one hardcore lady. I’m so sorry that you experienced such a freak accident. So lovely that your man proved to be a keeper and your son stepped up. Never mind about the gymnastics career: you’ve proven yourself 100 per cent as a fab human being!

Totally agree @BrontëParsonage about Kew being bloody funny. She really is. In person too!

what a lovely update - and lovely to see a pic of you and mini-Kew (and I assume your other half). What a horrible accident, Kew. Uggh.

we just celebrated our 10th anniversary with DS1. Still remember us bringing him home and me being so scared I had somehow killed him (giving him wrong food, wrong drink, wrong bed) as he slept solidly for 14 hours that first night. I slept not a jot….

you are an inspiration to us all! Well done both of you.

Good lord @Hels20 how the very devil are you!

I quite like being described as “hardcore” sounds much better than my orthopaedic surgeon describing me as “stoic” 🙄

Hi Kewcumber wow how lovely to hear from you, my youngest is now 18 and sadly in residential care as my lovely DH died last year and it was not safe to be on my own with the other 3. Am so glad all turned out so well with “Little Kewcumber” you must be so proud, enjoy your trip!
BTW just remembered I was 2old2beamum Good luck and take care!

@mumof2many1943 i remember you well, so so sorry to hear about your lovely DH, you must miss him terribly.

I am well sometimes, Kew, struggling other times. The good thing is that DS1 who is now 12 has been coping at secondary school. You may remember my anguish in primary school. Attends a mainstream and somehow copes. I even had his maths teacher call me to tell me she was so pleased with his focus and he came top in his class in a test! He even now manages to sit tests without having to be withdrawn. So proud of him. DS2 is utterly gorgeous and is 8 but suffers from really chronic ADHD which is super challenging….and makes me despair sometimes. Would love to find a better school for him.

@mumof2many1943 - I remember you. So sorry to hear about your DH. You really are an amazing lady.