Is there anything I can do? Or is this interfering?

[lightsonallon]

I don't know if this would be interfering but thought I'd post on here to see peoples views, or to get some advice.

A couple of weeks ago, my auntie told me that my nana (her mum) had another baby who she gave up for adoption. This will have been over 50 years ago. My nana doesn't know that I know. The only reason my auntie has told me is because she's worried about what will happen with my nana's will and house when she passes.

The baby who was adopted wrote to my nana several years ago a couple of times and she came to visit once. She sends my nana Christmas cards.
My auntie told me today that my nana also writes cards for her daughter who was adopted but my auntie doesn't send them, but she tells my nana that she does.

I felt so sad when she told me this. Because my nana would be hurt if she knew this, and I'm sad to think her adopted daughter might think she never bothers to send cards or stay in touch.

My auntie is a very negative and aggressive person. She doesn't want me to have any information about the adopted daughter. She says she can't remember her second name and she can't remember her address, only roughly the area she lives.

I suppose I'm wondering if there is anything I can do. I would like to speak to my nana about it but my auntie makes sure she's always there so that I can't have private conversations with my nana, so I'm never alone with her.

@lightsonallon
I suspect there are no right or wrong answers, you are likely to upset someone what ever you do.
It seems a bit odd that your auntie decided to tell you this. If she is worried that any inheritance will be shared with the adopted person, maybe she is hoping that you would support her in this behaviour.
She is clearly wrong in taking the cards and lying to your nana.
My gut feeling is that your nana deserves to know. So.the decision may be who you upset - your nana or your auntie.
Do you think there are other relatives who may know or who you could confide in for support?

That's very sad. You write your auntie is a negative and aggressive person and that your nana and her adopted daughter would feel sad and hurt if they knew. I think that is the decison right there.

It is not your aunt's place to decide who your nana can stay in contact with or who she can include in her will (if your nana is even considering that). You are worried about interfering; I would see it as stopping your aunt from interfering and causing harm.

Your aunt is a disgusting person and you should definitely tell your nan what is going on.

Is your nan unable to post cards herself due to old age/ physical disabilities ? Can you offer to post them for her ?

If a person is adopted. They loose any rights to inheritance. Unless specifically named in a will.

What a disgusting thing for anybody to do to their own mother. I’d say it’s your Nana’s choice what happens to her property, and if she wants her other child to have a part of her she has every right to do that. Imagine how hard it must have been back then to have to find you your child in the first place. I’d be giving the auntie a piece of my mind.