FASD experience

[WittyUsername123]

Was wondering if anyone has any experience of the risks associated with alcohol exposure & FASD? Currently looking into two LOs who had alcohol exposure (1yo and 2yo).

One year old appears totally normal and big for his age.

Two year old was language delayed at 20 months but has picked up a lot now (approx 29 months) and can always be understood etc unless he is really upset. Ed psyc says he is normal (growth, coordination, grip), except his behaviour as he struggles with anxiety, temper tantrums (eg throwing stuff, crying) and also is still quite scared to fall asleep alone. He’s attending nursery who do not have concerns. Has been potty trained and all seems normal there. I guess my question is, based on that, is he (or his sibling) at much of an increased risk of ending up 1) significantly developmentally delayed or 2) unable to live independently?

I would just really value the input of anyone who has any experience of children with alcohol exposure when older, like as teens for example. We want to be sure we can meet need for the long haul!

I would recommend Adoption UK webinars, they have a lot of FASD and also if you join in the prospective Adopter meet ups they are so helpful in learning experience of older teens with FASD from the Adoption uk team running it. i found these really helpful and a great starting point for looking further into FASD. Really really do your research - for us we had long known that we would be good parents for a child with FASD due to the way we parent etc long before we saw our new daughters profile. Its a huge huge spectrum like autism is and there are alot of crossovers with things like austism, adhd etc, so it is hard to predict. There are lots of good resources online and books, I read alot and listened to a lot of podcasts etc.
Try www.nhsaaa.net/media/5702/fasd-info-for-parents-carers-online.pdf
and
www.ftc.gov/sites/default/files/documents/public_comments/alcohol-reports-project-no.p114503-00004%C2%A0/00004-58256.pdf
and Al Coates & Scott Carson-Rennie Adoption & fostering podcast they have lots of podcast, and Jeff Noble again podcasts & books
and if you search on amazon youl see a range of great books.

Our dd is only 2 had a very difficult start but currently doing well but too young to know how it will effect her in later life. School is often the time youl notice more difficulties as it can be hard for them to adjust, but again every child will be affected differently. Things to start you off is difficulty with memory & impulse control, and its remembering to parent them with the understanding that maybe its not that they wont but that they cant, and take care not to harm their self esteem by telling them off all the time, and so add to the secondary characteristics that can come along for children with fasd, and taking care to build on the good stuff.

Im only in early days and so may be no help, but definitely recommend all these resources to help you make your decision.

I have experience with teenagers with FAS. These young people can struggle emotionally and can find making friends difficult as they can be immature for their age, often preferring activities meant for younger children, so can be quite isolated in school. If in mainstream school they will most probably need a lot of support and you may have to fight for this. They can be quite vulnerable, which brings its own worries.
it’s having acceptance that life with these children will be a life of highs and lows and may be more challenging than a typical family.
It’s such a spectrum so difficult to say if they will live independently as adults.
The children I know can be lovely, funny and joyful too.
Do your research and talk to the paediatrician if you are considering this match.

its so difficult to tell op. Our daughter was withdrawing when born. Birth mum had a negative test for heavy alcohol after she was born so certainly was not heavy drinking in the latter stages of pregnancy atleast and claims not to have drunk heavily. Our daughter had a consultation with an FASD paediatric expert during matching. She possibly has a genetic disorder so I don’t think we will ever know if she has some FASD and what level, she is big with none of the facial features but apparently they only show up in 10% of cases anyway. I believe that lots of funding and research will be going into FASD in the coming years as apparently it’s a big problem in the UK.

Mum of adopted teen here. Diagnosis of neonatal abstinence syndrome (drugs) but an assumption of exposure to alcohol in the womb as well. What I would say is that the behaviours of the two-year-old you’re interested in seem normal for a child of two. That’s not to diminish any concerns about future development.

So, the long haul stuff…My DD is now registered blind, having lost the majority of her sight at aged 11 due to her optical nerves being damaged by drugs while in utero. Recently, at the age of 14, she was diagnosed with ADHD and autism. Despite her many challenges, my DD is very capable and is thriving academically at a super-selective grammar school. She struggles socially and is less independent than her chronological age but we have had a lovely day out, shopping and lunching, today. I wish she had friends she could hang around with instead. But she doesn’t.

I also have a six-year-old DD, who was placed with me at 12 hours old. I’m fully aware of her backstory and there is no hint of exposure to drugs or alcohol. She is absolutely sharp as a whip but she still prefers to sleep in my bed (every night). And her tantrums are epic to the point that her nickname is Rumplestiltskin as she literally jumps up and down and could break through floors, while lashing out and kicking out violently. I find these tantrums mortifying, horrifying and depressing.

I guess what I’m trying to say is that there is no way as an adoptive parent that you will dodge the bullet fully. All of our children have their own issues, but none of us can fully predict the full extent of these at the outset. You have to be prepared to be armour plated but consider the upsides of having children versus not having children.

I am completing a research project looking at extra curricular activities for children with FASD, if you have 20 minutes to spare please complete the survey below.

The data you provide will be used for a research project to allow better understanding of the support available to promote participation in extra curricular activities for children with FASD.
The information you provide will be completely anonymous. Participation is voluntary and you may withdraw at any time.
This study is supervised by East Kent College and has ethical approval.
Findings from this study may be shared with FASD related groups, charities, education and government organisations. Please complete one survey per child.

Link to survey - FASD & extra curricular activities