Gah! 19m old not walking!

[BloodyNoreen]

I'm just worrying on here instead of to friends with birth children. My AS isn't walking yet and seems nowhere near ready. He is 19months old. I've taken him to the health visitor who says he seems ok, as he has done everything else in the right order. She has referred to physio just in case.

He was born withdrawing from methadone and spent month 1 in hospital. Is very small (0.4th centile for everything) and is generally a tiny little person. Allergies etc but we are coming out the other side of those now. He is a bright little chap and has made heaps of progress with bonding with us, routines, behaviour. We have had some dark dark times but honestly he has come such a long way.

He crawls like the speed of light, climbs up stairs, loves softplay, cruises around. But refuses to walk and he just doesn't seem ready. His little legs are so tiny and he doesn't have the balance. Because he is so tiny he just doesn't look ready iyswim.

Our AD was late for everything but walked by 16months.

I'm not a stranger to extra needs, we have been fighting for a diagnosis for AD for a couple of years. I just hate the age where you can't tell if it's linked to an extra problem or physical issue. I just want to support him.

Sorry, just rambling on. I'm an "experienced" adopter so I know I need to focus on how bloody well he is doing emotionally but the walking concerns me. Especially now people are asking me about it I'm tired and emotional.

Anybody else's adopted child late for this?

Our DD had none of these complications and didn't walk until 21 months.

She was a bum shuffler and seemed content to move around like that.

She was referred to a physio and he said she was fine.

Once she started though she was fine.

Our first LO (foster to adopt) did not walk untill they were 23 months old. It turned out they were short sighted and needed glasses. Appart from walking there was no evidence of vision problems as they crawled and cruised on furniture. It was quite a battle to get them tested. We ultimately paid privately and were immediately told of the vision issue. They walked a few days after getting glasses. I'm sharing just on the off chance this hasn't been explored. x

My DS had a similar start in life, and walked at 23 months. He also has hyper mobility so joint stabilisation is an issue for him, I don’t think it’s uncommon for our kids to be late in walking.

I just hate the age where you can't tell if it's linked to an extra problem or physical issue. I just want to support him this is exactly the problem, at the moment it is impossible to tell, it is really difficult for the parent! It sounds like it is just gross motor skills and if you google that to find out what you can do to help, it might help. It was a long time ago but from memory it was things like making sure the nutrition was right, that was very important, lots of carbs, and also the level of activity was right. it could be a few months more yet, and he might need a lot of attention paid to exercise and nutrition yet. At some point he might get frustrated with his own lack of strength, which is difficult too! I hope it all goes well. He is within milestones at the moment.

With other people you can just say it is fine, late walking runs in the family, so that they don't make it worse with assumptions. People assume that slow walkers will end up not physically able or sport or at school and that is not true at all.

Our perfectly healthy daughter walked at 24 months. It's late but usually nothing to be concerned about. He'll get there x

Thanks all!

Unfortunately diet has been difficult because of milk allergies and egg. However we are now ok for milk so trying to fatten him up! He is so tiny.

Funnily enough we have just been to the hospital as I was concerned about his eyes. He has a squint and his pupils are different sizes. They put eye drops in his eyes as they wanted to see if he needed glasses but all ok apparently? He will have another check up in a year.

His balance just isn't there yet. He is more interested in walking holding hands now so that is something. But he just isn't ready. Sigh.

We recently had a psychologist assessment for our 5 year old and she mentioned low muscle tone along with other sensory issues that are common in traumatised children. Like you we are frequently on the borderline between'normal' and additional needs. I think having a look at things like this might be worth it for your little one. Beacon House school have some resources that might be worth a look and I'm currently reading improving sensory processing in traumatised children which I'm finding really helpful.

Sounds like our wee one - similar history and he did walk about 18 months... But was wobbly and was very speedy in other ways - he used a little triangle shaped toy like a zimmer and pushed it around i hope i have some video of that cause it was funny! Sounds like all the foundations are there (i.e. crawling cruising etc) but the physio's advice will help. I did wonder with our wee one - did he not see the point to walking cause he got where he wanted very quickly by crawling and pushing things...