What if you don't have any experience with children?

[adoptquestion]

We had fertility issues many years ago and after lots of miscarriages sadly gave up on the idea of a family.

In the last year we've been talking about how we're really over it all, but we would still love to have a family. Perhaps naively, we hope that we'd be good parents, especially if there were children with autism who needed special understanding as we're both on the spectrum.

But we don't have any experience with them and have no way to get any either - none of our family members have children, and all our friends with kids live hours away.

Realistically, will this block any chances of us being adoptive parents? Is it even worth enquiring or is it a waste of time?

[Ted27]

No its not a waste of time, but talk to a number of different agencies. Some agencies make a bigger deal of this than others.

Pre pandemic people did things like Brownies/Cubs. You could look into whether there any volunteering opportunities in schools to listen to children reading. There may be youth groups you can involved in.
If you have a local autism group maybe they have some opportunities for you to offer a bit of respite support
I ran a gardening club at my local primary school.
Think about what you have to offer and where some help might be welcomed
Good luck

[Remy7]

We've got experience through volunteering (yes through covid) at junior parkrun. Every Sunday 9am for an hour as a marshal which counted as experience (with other things) on our application. Ask around the area and see what clubs may be happening at the moment you could help with.
Good luck x

[Jellycatspyjamas]

Different agencies want different levels of experience, what I would say though is that absolutely nothing will prepare you for parenting your own child and adoption particularly. If you have no experience at all then I’d look at getting involved in community groups etc just to see the wide range of kids, behaviours, energy levels and to give you a realistic sense of what kids are able to do, to understand and to cope with at various ages and stages. It won’t prepare you for parenthood but it will give you a sense of whether you like being around kids (sometimes the idea is more appealing than the reality).

If you have a particular interest in autism, do some volunteer work with kids with autism, while your own diagnosis can be a strength it can also bring it’s own challenges and it would be useful to test those out before you become parents.