Work and the adoption process

[ohfook]

Hi dh and I have been discussing for a while adoption and I think we're ready to take the first step and start contacting agencies.

One thing I can't quite get my head around is how the adoption process works with your job. I understand there's a lot of training and social worker visits. Were your employers alright about giving you time off for this or did you have to try and schedule everything around work?

Also once you were matched did that give you much notice to tell your employer that you'd need to begin your adoption leave soon or did you have to tell them before that?

Sorry if these are stupid questions I'm just trying to get things straight in my head before we begin. I think I work for a fairly understanding employer and I've seen them be really flexible with the parents I work with, I'm just not sure how this works!

The company DH & I both worked for offered flexi time.
So we took annual leave for the training course, and then flexi leave for homestudy.
HR knew because they had to provide an employer reference, but our line managers didn't.

Once approved I gave a heads up to my team manager so we could ensure quietly in the background that my knowledge was shared with other team members.
Then once we had a link (which was 15 months after approval) and were headed to panel we did some more formal handover plannning.
I didn't tell the rest of the team until after panel. Being blokes they weren't too bothered, until I said I had precisely 4.5 working days until I left which panicked them a bit.

DH & I had around 50 years at the company between us, we got a lovely card & gifts for the DDs.

Not stupid questions!
Me and DH got 5 days paid leave for the training etc. I was just really open with my work when it came to matching etc and they were really supportive. Ended up with about 6 weeks notice after matching panel but because I’d talked to them and just made them aware it wasn’t a big deal. DH’s work didn’t bat an eye. He told them his intention to take a month off (2 weeks paternity, 2 weeks annual leave) but I think they are quite used to men taking paternity leave last minute so it wasn’t an issue.

I managed to get some sw visits in at lunchtime or right after work as the sw office was close to where I worked. I did burn through some annual leave when the meetings had to be at my home and also for the training days. My company's policy is to grant five days for meetings, which I think I saved most of for intros.

Unlike the pp I had my line manager do the work reference. So I told my line manager early on but only told hr a couple of months before I left, when the match was looking reasonably certain. The thing is in a lot of cases you can't give proper notice. If you have a date for matching panel you will have probable time lines to work to but things may get pushed back and by the time the match is actually approved you might only have a week or so to say your goodbyes.

The other thing to consider, especially as it will come up in the assessment process, is your company's adoption leave policy. Don't assume that a generous maternity/paternity leave pay policy will automatically be followed for adoption leave. Some places make their top ups to the statutory payments contingent on returning to work for them for so long which might not be feasible in an adoption situation. I know of one couple whose plans to adopt fell through because while their employer had a generous package for all parents, if both parents worked for the company only one could claim at any given time. I know of another couple who adopted children classed as hard to place so where given an adoption allowance to top up the main carer's leave so she could take a full year off.

We've both been lucky that our companies have been very generous and relaxed around the training / sw meetings etc.

I told my boss when we moved from stg 1 to stg2 and then told my team after approval panel, our central HR did my reference. I took paid leave for the 3 days training and have fitted in sw meetings around work

My partners company have been equally as flexible, even allowing him to use a managers office for one of our calls so he didn't have to book time off.

Sadly our plans have changed since being linked and having matching panel. (We thought we were starting intros yesterday and the kids moving in at end of November but 2 days before matching panel it was changed to longer intros and kids moving in in January)

Work have been great about it and we're trying to keep them updated as much as possible but it's been hard as we still don't have a date yet (sw's meeting tomorrow to discuss plan). We've gone from having 15 days of leave stored up ready for intros to carrying some over to next leave year

My partners company rewrote their parental leave policy to include adoption when he asked about the policy. Its good but not as good as mine is so we're sharing the leave and I'm doing the first stint, he's doing the 2nd

Thank you for that advice. It's definitely given me food for thought.

I hadn't actually considered that adoption pay and maternity pay might be different, so I'll look into that too. I work for local government so I'm fairly sure their pay policy will be underwhelming but not so poor as to draw criticism.