Changing jobs before adoption

[Whilewetry123]

Hello! I’ve come here for some advice as I’m struggling to find anything online. Myself and my partner are hoping to start the adoption process in the next few months. After a year of fertility treatments we’ve decided it’s just not for us and are excited to start our journey to adoption.
I was made redundant in May this year due to covid etc. I decided to take a couple of months off to have some time to relax after all that the past year has thrown at us and was in no real rush to find a new job. I was lucky to be in a position to wait until I found the right job that I could see myself building a long career in. Fast forward to now, I’ve just started a new job and I feel so upset. I feel that I’ve been completely blindsided, as the job role I’m actually doing is nothing like what I was sold. I feel like they hugely exaggerated the role to get me on board (I was contacted by them about the job).
I just wondered how long I have to be in a job before starting the adoption process and if I can considering change my job whilst in the process?
If it would hinder our adoption journey, I would stay in the role and re-consider my options once we adopt our child, but if it could be an option to change job sooner I would.

Thanks for taking the time to read!!

Hey, so we had this issue with my partner but the adoption agency were surprisingly down to earth about it. I do think it's agency dependent (ours leant more towards the fairly reasonable side of things) and also depends on the other circumstances you have except for that. So if in other ways you are very settled and no red flags for them and you can demonstrate stability in other ways you should be ok , also helpful if your partner's role is stable will help sell it to them. You did mention having finished a year of fertility treatment and hoping to start inna few months. Just in case you weren't aware typically agencies are looking to see that you've put some distance Inbetween fertility treatments and adoption and that you've done some emotional work to feel ready to move on and grieve your loss. It differs but this typically looks.somethibg like having had a year space from your last fertility treatment. If like me you find it hard to know where you stand in limbo I'd suggest a prelim phone call with agencies you're interested in so you can gauge their attitude to this and timeframes so you know what you're working to. The only other favtor I can think of is they'll want to know how supportive any new role is of attending adoption appts etc which will require some flexibility and understanding in an employer. I say this because it usually necessitates being quite open from early stages about your plans to adopt with your new role as employer reference is one of the first checks and obviously some ppl find that difficult.

So for me it's about getting your ducks in a row. Doing some prelim calling about, getting an idea of the outlook of the agencies you'd like to approach, and then being in a position to carve a game plan

I agree with what @veejayteekay says.

As well as that, you’ll need to consider how much time you’ll need to take off on adoption leave. Most agencies ask for a year. If that’s going to be you rather than your partner, then will staying in your current job give you the best shot at that, or could you get it in a new job?

FWIW, I was in a job I found v v v tough before we adopted DD. I stayed because I had a good relationship with my boss and knew she’d support me with going off, unpredictable timescales etc. And because I was entitled to a v generous adoption leave package.

The job nearly killed me but I think those benefits were worth it.

I changed jobs during the assessment process - tbh it was seen as a positive because the job I had wasn’t greatly family friendly and my new job came with better hours and flexibility. Also remember that you could wait a while for matching so making a decision to stay in your current job could meant being there for a couple of years - you might be ok with that all things considered but it might be worth looking now - by the time you’re in a position to taje adoption leave you’ll have had enough time to acquire leave entitlement.

Organisations aren’t allowed to discriminate on grounds of adoption any more than they are for pregnancy.

I also changed my job mid process. It did delay me because I needed to give it a few months before I told them my plans

To be honest I left a job I loved for a not very exciting role in the civil service. My agency didnt mind as it was a 7k increase in salary and far superior adoption leave. The terms and conditions in general were much more family friendly, flexible working etc , which I didn't have in my old job.
Its worth weighing up what this job offers you in adoption leave, flexible working etc
Alternatively, given that you haven't started the adoption process yet, and depending on how quickly you think you can find another job, and your level of misery in the current job, it might be worth delaying starting adoption until you can change jobs.
I don't think it will matter to your agency, but it may matter much more to you.
Since I've been back in the civil service I've gone from being thoroughly miserable, to mildly unhappy, to just about bearable, not necessarily in that order. I'm now in a role I'm happy with and work with a great bunch of people, but its far from my dream job.
I can't beat it for pay, flexibility and annual leave etc. Its been worth the sacrifice of doing a job I really loved.

In my experience if you hate your job get that sorted now. Of course there are other factors to consider and as other posters have said it is easier to overlook if everything else is fairly stable. You could have a long wait ahead until being matched, adopters will tell you how gruelling the process is and if your struggling with your job it won't make it easier on you...

Good luck, adoption is amazing!