Sophie Martyn death

[AdventuresDownRabbitholes]

I was reading about the awful Plymouth shootings, and they said the tiny girl who was shot had been adopted.

Will they tell the birth family? I guess with a name change and the passage of time they may not recognise her in the press - though it would be awful if that was the way they found out what had become of their birth child.

I hate to think of the birth family waiting and hoping she'll seek them out when she's 18, not knowing she died at 3

Such a tragedy for everyone.

Her name may not have been changed and its very likely that the parents will have met. So its possible that the birth parents could recognise her from the press coverage.
But yes social services will inform them.

A social worker will have visited the family before the name and images were published, it would have been one of the reasons for the delay in releasing the information.

@Sparkles1966

A social worker will have visited the family before the name and images were published, it would have been one of the reasons for the delay in releasing the information.

That would be what I would have assumed.

For context I'm an adult adoptee, I was surprised that news coverage mentioned that she was adopted.

I was surprised that news coverage mentioned that she was adopted

I guess her birth family might make some sort of public statement at some point or at least share the news among their family and friends and it might hit social media so they're just pre-empting that maybe.

If she’s 3 her adoption will be relatively recent, even if placed as a baby so it was likely to get out - I think they’re just preempting that. Awful for all concerned.

Terrible loss.

@vjg13

For context I'm an adult adoptee, I was surprised that news coverage mentioned that she was adopted.

Me too.

The birth family will have been informed prior and releasing the fact she was adopted would have been considered carefully based on whether it was ok to do so. It may be that the adoption was an open or in family adoption too remember. Her birth mother/parents may be at a public memorial service too

I didn’t cotton on - the wording I read was something like “[FATHERS NAME] and his daughter, who he had adopted” and I assumed like in a step parent capacity.

I’m glad posters who seem to know about these things have said that the birth parents will have been informed prior to press coverage. Awful thing to have happened.

Found this case where it took the social workers 8 months to get off their arses and tell the birth family their child had died www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-wales-south-east-wales-41892994.amp

I assumed they'd trawled the father's social media and found references to her adoption / gone knocking on doors and a neighbour said

I thought it might have been the press making the statement without thinking about whether it was the right thing to do. But I don't know.

The whole thing is horrendous.

I don't think its appropriate to speculate about the adoption, public memorials and who may or may not be there.
@AdventuresDownRabbitholes - what point are you trying to make in trawling the internet to find other adopted children who have been sadly murdered and how long it took SWs to inform the birth family.
A little girl and her dad have lost their lives, four other families are devastated. Can we leave it at that

I agree with Ted.

All that the fact of her adoption means is that there were likely more families who suffered this terrible loss. We know nothing more, and conjecture helps no one.

Terrible loss.

I actually wrote a complaint to one of the newspapers asking them to justify why the fact that she was adopted was relevant. They took the information off the deceased father's Facebook page. This was a reputable newspaper. I was very angry.

They emailed me back an apology and removed the reference from the article, agreeing that it was not relevant.

I'm sick of the media publishing when children are adopted, as though it makes our relationships "less". I've decided to complain every time I see it. My little one woman mission.

@ProfessionalComplainer well done you.

There is a nasty undertone that it means the loss is less. It's not.

@ProfessionalComplainer

I actually wrote a complaint to one of the newspapers asking them to justify why the fact that she was adopted was relevant. They took the information off the deceased father's Facebook page. This was a reputable newspaper. I was very angry.

They emailed me back an apology and removed the reference from the article, agreeing that it was not relevant.

I'm sick of the media publishing when children are adopted, as though it makes our relationships "less". I've decided to complain every time I see it. My little one woman mission.

Well done.

@Ted27 👏👏👏👏👏

I didn't think of the relationship as being any "less"; I felt very sorry for two families. For the adoptive family who clearly wanted their daughter very much, and for the birth family who have lost the not only the chance to raise their daughter but also the consoling hope that she might seek them out in adulthood.

@Ted27 I've no axe to grind, if that's what you mean, and nor did I trawl the internet for that story. It's just one that stuck in my mind because it was local.

Adoptees have no obligation to seek out their birth family.

It's a terrible loss for all concerned.

I think ted17's shot across the bows could have been put more gently, and gordongrumpy's latest post is not relevant here at all. Most people are shocked at a mother and four strangers being shot by a young man, one of the strangers being a very young child. It is shocking. The fact that he had a gun is shocking.

But if this going to be made about adoption, everyone involved in adoption will come at it from different persectives and being antagonistic and judgemental does not help anyone.

*ted27's