Adopting a baby - any tips and advice?

[UKABC]

Hi,

We’ve got a 12 month baby joining our family in about 3 weeks. We are a family of four, with a 5 and 7 year old, also adopted. We don’t have experience with babies, as our youngest was adopted when he was 2.

For those that have adopted babies of a similar age, do you have any tips and advice? I once heard that babies can settle quicker into a family than a 2 year old for example. Is this accurate? I remember it took our kids nearly 6 months to fully settle.

Also, we’re trying not to buy too many things this time around - just a highchair, a car seat, a cot, and some baby eating utensils. Are there any basics that you suggest buying before the baby moves in with us?

Thanks

I have said this before on many post. Get a Rocket baby rocker, it worked wonders on the sleepless nights, attached to your buggy and vibrates it.

Our LO came to us at 12 months and we had no kids in the house so it was all new to us.

You will have all the basics cover as you have the other kids I am sure. My biggest worry was how much to they need to eat. You don't get that in the adoption training :-)

Good luck and all the best.

Hi, thank you for the tip. I just saw it in youtube and it looks like an awesome little gadget. I’m definitely getting that! :)

We've just had a 14 month old placed with us, my recommendations are coverall bibs for mealtimes, the close pop in one's are by far the best bibs we have ever used! The ikea basic highchair is so much better for cleaning etc than any padded fancy ones. We used to have a cushioned bigger chair for my birth son but I much prefer the ikea one. We also are doing baby led weaning and have found a shower curtain on the floor under the highchair helps cleaning a lot! Dont buy toys etc until you know what is coming from foster carer. Our LO had absolutely tons and tons of toys!
Teething hit us almost immediately after placement, so we have really needed calpol, nurofen and teething powders! And good chewy toys! I got a matchstick monkey teether which has been amazing!

It's worth also checking what washing powder FC uses as the familiar smell can help. If possible have the room set out the same as they are used to eg cot against a wall if that's what they had. Babies are no easier or no harder to settle, it's a very individual thing and will vary from child to child regardless of age. Check with the FC what the child will come with such as clothes or toys and if they have a comforter for naps and bed time ensure you have that.

Congratulations on your new baby. Make sure you find out what size clothes they are as they vary a lot in size at that age. Our dd was 15 months but in much larger clothes sizes. Buys lots of nappies in the right size as they go through about 7 a day. Have lots of bottles and formula ours ate a lot more with us due to a growth spurt and probably some anxiety so you don’t want to be washing bottles all the time. Have nappy changing caddies so everything is to hand and more than one mat so you can be washing and drying one while using another. They are so lovely at that age and ours has settled so well and quickly. There is nothing like chubby legs and knees.

Thank you for the great comments you two. So useful! I’m definitely going to have fun buying all of those things in the next two weeks in preparation for the baby’s arrival. :)

@UKABC

No advice for you but congratulations that's amazing

Congratulations! It might be worth checking with the foster carer what is coming with the LO. As our little boy was 6 months and the foster carer sent him with pretty much a full wardrobe of clothes and some toys. We bought him a special soft toy, but kept things (other than necessities) to a minimum. How are you friends and family regarding gifts. As we had been waiting to be matched for a year our friends and family went bananas, luckily they were all pretty receptive to giving vouchers/next size up clothes/practical stuff like a baby bath etc.
Find out what wipes and nappies cream the foster carer uses and get the same.
Second the IKEA high chair.

Congratulations! We were lucky enough to be given or lent lots of baby items from friends that had older children and wanted to clear some space! Don't be afraid of asking good friends if you can borrow items.

We bought a very good quality pushchair second hand because we didn't need the carrycot part for tiny babies.

Now libraries are opening, if you have one nearby, I'd recommend signing your new baby up for a library card!

I agree with what others have said about asking FC about washing powder, bubble bath, same nappy brand, same formula etc. All help with settling your child.

We did early placement training that recommended 'baby wearing' to help with bonding. I carried my LO around in a harness a lot. Luckily, he was tiny and not very heavy as it's hard work on your back!

Ah that’s lovely, I just wanted to add that cheap hand towels make good changing mats, especially dark brown! I got about five and then they are easy to wash if they get dirty and if they’re cheap if they get ruined it’s not a drama.