Babies born into drug addiction

[ExperienceTheLifeYouHave]

Hi all,
Frequent lurker and name changer. Already have one adopted child and all going well. Have been matched with baby number two! Baby developing normally but was born to a mother addicted to drugs. Baby meeting milestones at the moment.

Are there any good websites or research you can point me to? When I Google it I am totally overwhelmed by the amount of research and articles. Or is anyone willing to share their experience?

Hi,I'm not sure how much help I'll be but I can share my experience. My youngest dd was born addicted, she went through withdrawal after birth - which was pretty much hell. She was placed in my care the day she was born for complicated/unusual reasons.
You don't mention how old baby is?
My dd definitely had a certain cry, like a high pitched keening until she was about 18 months, which is pretty usual. She also barely slept as her brain couldn't really switch off. She has hit all her developmental milestones but she also began to have seizures, and has a seizure disorder for life. I'd be happy to offer more info on the medical aspect if it would help but not on a public board - feel free to message me.
This didn't manifest itself properly until she was about 2, when we got a formal diagnosis. She also has mild FASD which often goes hand in hand with maternal drug use.
It's been a long road and there are a huge number of complicating factors, hence the huge amount of information available, most of it conflicting as there's such variation - but my dd is wonderful, fun, smart and fearless. She was slow to walk and suffered coordination issues once the seizures began to occur in earnest but now she tears around after her brothers. She's just amazing.
The best advice I would give you is to ask as many questions as possible and ask them to be as specific as possible, this will help you research. Also and this is the biggest thing, children who are born addicted/FASD often have issues that simply don't present until later on, the spectrum of issues is also huge and Unpredictability is a huge part of my life now in that sense.

My youngest was born addicted. He was removed from BM at 6mo and came to us at 18mo.

Absolutely no hint of any ongoing effects. (He’s 9 now.)

I remember when I was looking for the same info I kept coming up against that there really wasn’t any - women that are taking heroin through pregnancy are also likely to be drinking/smoking/suffering massive stress/DV etc and it just becomes impossible to separate it all out.

I found this on the bbc this week though. I found it quite a tough watch.
www.bbc.co.uk/news/av/world-us-canada-56581394

Thank you both! Baby is around a year old and sleeps well/meets milestones. However I know that might not mean much. I feel a little happier that they are an older baby as it means we know a little more I guess.

For the seizures, how old was your baby when they began to have those? I had read it was a possibility.

Thank you so much

My dd probably had them in one form or another from birth but they were not obvious/weren't picked up as in young babies they are often very difficult to diagnose. In terms of proper classic tonic clinic seizures she was 2 when she began to suffer those, epilepsy/a seizure disorder was diagnosed by the time she was 2 and a half.

There is US based Facebook group called neonatal abstinence syndrome support. It has British based members too. It's very informative and supportive.

Our baby was in hospital for 7 weeks in withdrawal. He was removed from birth. He’s 5 now. There are minor things which could result from substance abuse like he has a weak digestive system and his poos are very sloppy. We started to notice more sensory seeking behaviours as he got older. He’s now 5 and just received a diagnosis of Dyspraxia. As a previous poster has said because BM may have been under significant stress during pregnancy may have smoked drank etc as well as taking drugs it is hard to separate out the whys.

Yes it is impossible to separate out the issues. I will check out the Facebook group.

Hi there. We adopted twins from a birth mother who was addicted to drugs and alcohol. (I assume you already know that statistically alcohol has much worse long term effects on a baby and the two are invariably used together and there's very little really meaningful research been done?). Our twins came to us when they were just over a year old, having spent the majority of their first year in the bf. they had slight delays in milestones like walking but nothing very worrying. They're at school now and they both show signs of struggling academically. And despite being fully aware of the situation it was not possible to really see any issues pre-school. Curiously, despite their completely shared experiences, in utero, with bf, and with us, one of the twins is affected far more severely than the other, presenting with all kinds of sensory processing, coordination, attention and self-regulation issues. All of these difficulties can be attributed both to mild FASD and to attachment disorders. It's a potential minefield which we are just starting to pick our way through with a very good OT. But we are lucky enough to be able to self-fund this treatment which can be a consideration since we've been on a waiting list for 6 months at our local RAA to be allocated an assessing SW for the ASF. Bottom line is that every child reacts differently to the substance misuse of its both mother. There's no way of telling in advance. It is a gamble but I'm very happy to have taken it, personally. Very best of luck to you.

Gobbledegook sums it up perfectly: it's a huge gamble but it was one I was happy to take and I don't regret it, not for a second.

I've been trawling through the Facebook group and basically scaring myself silly. We have an adopted child already who is a joy. Some issues but nothing we can't handle. I'm now reading all the horror stories and wondering if I was daft to think I could take the risk again.

I remember all these emotions the first time round, all the "red flags" on our child's report. Feeling like I could never cope with anything extra. But we have and we have a raised a happy, well adjusted little person (so far).

No mention of alcohol abuse, but yes I'm aware that will be mixed up in there somewhere (or perhaps not...there were a lot of drugs ). I can also see from reading that many issues don't come out until the children hit 3 or 4.

It's so emotional. I just want to curl up and cry somewhere now. I know the routine, I need to let it all sink in and then reassess tomorrow. I'm a catastrophiser by nature.

And thank you for being honest. The idea that it's a gamble but one you are happy to take resonates with me. Our child could change in personality tomorrow but we would still love her to death because she is now OURS. Not a frightening report on a piece of paper.

OP I hear you. It’s such a massive gamble, especially when you’ve already had one throw of the dice work out for you.

I’m often very thankful we got both DC at once because I’m not sure I’d have dared do it twice.

Good luck 💐

My DD12 was born drug dependant. We adopted her at 10 months and like you we struggled to find any useful info about how this was likely to effect her has she grew up. Foster mother went through the difficult period of settling her as a new born but by 6 months there were no real concerns about her development.

All we really had to go on was that her two older siblings had also been adopted from birth and were both doing fine.

DD has always seemed to be about a year younger than her peers both in size and development and this is not helped by her also being a summer born. She struggles academically but is fine socially and emotionally.

She managed to pass one of her Y6 SATs and missed out on the others by one and two points. This was an amazing achievement for her as she wasn't even going to sit them at one stage. We support her with extra tutoring and before Covid she was getting additional tutoring and support at school through her PPP funding. An Ed psychologist noted processing difficulties but no diagnoses learning difficulties.

She is doing ok at a mainstream secondary school ( is in set 3 out of 4 for all subjects except PE - top set.

She's really lovely and we are realistic about what she is likely to achieve academically and encourage her as much as possible in the things she is good at ( singing, acting and running )

Your post really resonates with me as I am about to go to matching panel to be matched with a little one with a very similar in utero experience. I’ve gone through every emotion possible, over the past three months, while trying to find out as much information as I could. I spent many nights really panicking about what the future might hold, and whether I could cope but in the end I knew that being her mum was something I could (hopefully) cope with but not being her mum wasn’t.
I still have moments where my heart races, and I freak out a little bit, especially when a new piece of information suddenly comes to light but I now realise that while I still research as much as humanly possible, I have just had to accept that I’ll never really know as it’s impossible to pick apart all of her exposures.

@Eriskay, we had that feeling before we adopted our little boy. We went in with our eyes open and had no expectations about what he would achieve. He learnt to ride a bike without stabilisers over lockdown and it was his greatest achievement. It took him a week of hard work. I could have cried when he raced off confidently.
Your approach of going in with your eyes open is the right way to handle the situation.

@hiptobesquare he sounds like a wee star. You must be so, so proud of him. I can’t wait to celebrate like that with my little girl. I’m going to be such an embarrassment to her as she’s going to have her own personal cheerleader 😃.

Thank you all! We are still pursuing the match. We've read the reports etc and, although it's a horrifying read, there is still a little person at the end of it who, at the moment, is settled and meeting milestones and contented.

The worries about the future will always be there. But we both agree we feel more confident this time round!

Hiya I have adopted my foster daughter who was born addicted, I have joined the NAS Facebook group if you would like the link and happy to answer any questions x