This was feeling like a disaster......but we're all still surviving

[Runner31]

I thought I might give a little update as I often wonder what happened to some people.
Well, AS moved in in January with FC severing contact following a shortened transition (5 days), sibling contact up in the air and still to have final contact with birth mum.
Well, it has been rocky but on the whole, the good days out number the bad. I am slowly feeling this unbelievable care for the little person in our lives and I love watching him settle and relax. The more he relaxes, the easier it is for us to see the times when he is trying to hide anxiety.
FC provided a goodbye letter which helped a lot and although everything else still a mess we're working through everything with honesty.
We have a huge hurdle to overcome in terms of his understanding of relationships. He gets very uncomfortable when DH and I spend time with him together and is very fixated on girlfriends at school (he's 7yrs old). Some of it is normal but some of it is definitely not.
We're hopeful ongoing CAMHS support will help us along the way.
Life is slowly beginning to feel normal and our mantra of 'faking it till we become it' in terms of feeling like a family is definitely paying off.

That’s a lovely update. It’s early days and you’ve been let down by many professionals but sounds like you are becoming a family. Wishing you all the best

@Runner31

What a fabulous update ! You have all come such a long way in such a very short time
You have a long journey ahead of you, but it sounds like you are laying good foundations.

Pleased to hear it, OP

I meant to do a smile too !

@Runner31, I’m a fairly infrequent poster here so I don’t know your backstory, sorry, but I was touched by your update and wanted to wish you well. In addition to CAMHS (or possibly as an alternative to, as CAMHS in many areas can be of very questionable quality, sadly), why not seek help via the ASF? Don’t forget also that your son will also qualify for pupil premium+ funding via his school. Time to develop sharp elbows now!

Good luck to you! Nowt wrong with faking-it-till-you-make-it - 13 years in here and it’s still a mantra.

Im so glad to hear your update Runner! So glad things are a little bit more settled and Happy First mothers day! Im sure things will slowly slowly get better and better (with lots of ups and downs in between!) and by next mothers day all much more settled. :)

Wow you are amazing and so is he, I felt so angry for you after reading your initial post. You are moving forward which is the main change, make sure you fight for every bit of help for your boy, he is definitely going too need some therapy on the understanding side of his Birth family relationships and new relationships in his life, this is already evident as you mention girlfriends at school. You truly had the worst start I have ever heard of and I have unfortunately witnessed a few as a foster career and adopter, I would put in an official complaint against the foster career if you have the time as their behaviour was disgraceful, good luck