Ex partner details for adoption process

[miksla]

Hello, I am at the beginning of trying to adopt my step child, i have an appointment to start the process this month and one thing that concerns me is the point that says they need previous partner details. I was previously married and have two children that i do not see now and have very limited contact with due to the other parent and their partner's behaviour towards me several years ago. Will they still be required to contact them? Does anyone have any experience of a situation like this where they did not want an ex partner to be contacted and was there a way to avoid them doing it?

I would imagine they would definitely need to speak to them as it is a partner you have had children with. They are likely to want to explore a lot around your other children too I'd imagine

I'm certain they will need to speak with your ex partner. There will need to be very exceptional and unusual circumstances for them to risk placing children if you don't care for the ones you already have, I would think.

Posters note, this is a step parent adoption so not a 'placing children' situation. Though I too would think they would want to explore why you don't see your existing children.

Sorry, my oversight. They may be more flexible in a step child situation. But they will certainly need to speak to your ex.

I doubt there’s a way to avoid them being in contact unless there were safety issues for you, eg that you’d fled domestic abuse and the ex-partner was such a risk that having any idea of where you are now would present danger. In saying that SW are very used to dealing with ex-partners who might try to bad mouth you or be vengeful, you’ll need to be very open about what happened in the past. I’d also expect them to want to explore why you don’t see your children, the circumstances surrounding that decision and what’s happened since then.

The more open you can be, the better but it’s not necessarily the case that an ex-partner can ruin your adoption plans.