What do all you lovely adoptive parents do for work

[MischiefManager]

AD is due to start school next year. She is in private nursery now 3 days a week and I childmind in those days. She copes in nursery and they are very supportive but it’s not ideal and the days are longer than I’d like. Once she starts school I either have the option of using before and after school clubs or abandoning childminding and looking for something else. I am fairly sure she is going to find school tough and will need me to be there for her when she comes home. Some sort of flexible self employment seems a sensible option I’m just not too sure what. Just wondered what other had found that works around their children’s needs?

I’ve adopted twice and am approved as a foster Carer. This is good in that I’m based at home, so am also there for my children during the day if they need me. Also, as adopters tend to have a good understanding of trauma, attachment needs and therapeutic parenting - this is helpful when dealing with fostered children too (and vice versa). However, it’s very much dependant on your own resilience levels and how settled your adoptive children are. We have to ensure that the matching is very careful as, although happy and settled, our adopted children do have additional needs and we don’t want the fostering to impact negatively on them. So far, it has been very positive, but we may have to review again when out little ones become teens!

I work in the civil service, has excellent terms and conditions and most departments are very family friendly - flexible working, flex time, of course most of us now working at home but even when life returns to some level of normality there will still be a lot of home working

I am a foster carer as well. So always at home . It works well.

Another foster carer 😂

Just about to swap to respite foster care though to give me more time with DS as he is having a hard time at the moment.

Ted27 that’s interesting. I’ve seen a job with our local authority that is entirely home based for now and partly home based anyway. Only thing is the office is an hour away. They say they offer flexible working so I’m wondering if I could still do school runs and then work from home around it. I guess there’s no harm in applying and then worrying about it if I manage to get to interview.

No spare bedroom for fostering unfortunately and I’m not sure whether LO would cope with it at the minute although I’d love to do it.

@MischiefManager

My son was 7 when he arrived, I did school hours on four days, but had a 10 minute walk to the office and school was opposite the office so very easy.
Think about different scenarios and what could work
eg use breakfast club only and work 9 till 2 so you can be there for pick up
use afterschool club only and work 10 till 5
use both and work three long days only
use neither and work 5 short days
combination of short and long days
part time or full time etc etc

I’d apply and see what happens. If nothing else good to get some practice doing the application and hopefully interview

I work with the local authority, my work is very flexible and I have a boss with an excellent understanding of the needs of adopted children so if I need time to deal with a crisis I can take it without stressing about it. I work part time and can easily swap days etc, I also run a small business which means I can flex my workload there as need be.

I am a civil servant too and endorse what Ted said!

@Stolenkisses
@flapjackfairy
@SFCA

How old were your children when you started fostering? AD is 4 and BD is 11 it’s something I would definitely consider in the future!

I work in the NHS and they are also flexible with child care. Most of the adoptive parents I know work in nurseries.

I don’t mean this as a criticism but why is your child not with you when you childmind? I would have thought that you could childmind around your child’s needs rather than her be in nursery long hours whilst you’re with other children. Am I missing the point? From my own experience I chose childminding as a career when my child was young because I was a single parent and wanted some way of earning money whilst being able to be there for my child.

@Cissyandflora that was the plan. I left teaching to reduce her nursery hours and spend more time with her. Unfortunately she doesn’t cope here while I childmind at all and it quite unexpectedly triggered some extreme behaviours from her. It was not fair on anyone to have her here so for now she is in nursery while I decide what my next move is. She is much happier with this arrangement though I am not. Hence me looking at alternatives.

Ah ok that makes sense. In that case I can see why you need a change. Childminding can be ideal but obviously not in every case. Fostering could be equally, if not more, difficult. I’ve done both. I think the ideas about office type jobs now allowing you to work from home more is actually going to be an upside of the pandemic that might help women who are trying to manage family and work life. Good luck anyway.

I have three birth children and they were 7,8 and 10 when we started fostering. I gave up teaching to foster and the second child we fostered, we then went onto adopt and she is now 9. We also adopted a two year old boy that had been placed with us and he is now nearly five. My nine year old AD loves the coming and goings of fostering and has always fully embraced it. However, we haven’t fostered at all since adopting our little ds (two years ago) and I’m not sure how he will feel. He is very settled but is a real mummy’s boy, so not sure how he will take to sharing me with other little ones! Because of this, we have decided to do a different sort of fostering and we are waiting for an unaccompanied asylum seeker child. This is something that I have wanted to do for a long time and as the child placed is likely to be a teenager, we feel that this will fit in well with our family.

Our DS was our foster son first! We took on a second foster child when DS was 2, long term foster child was 1. 1 and 2 year old worked really well 2 & 3 year olds were a bit trickier 😂

The plan was for me to go back to work when both kids were at school. I had reached a level at work were I could now freelance. Littlest started school in September, with Covid and all the unknowns I am holding off starting freelance or another job in case we have to home school again. I know we are in a very fortunate position to be able to do this. We have some land and this year I started to grow my own fruit and veg and we have just got some chickens - there is a business here somewhere but I’m not sure if I’m knowledgeable or skilled enough to make something work (I am very much a ‘stick seed in ground, see what happens’). So for now I don’t know - but I’m no house domestic that’s for sure and I think I need an alternative identity to just mummy.

I have 3 birth children. They were 14, 11 and 4 when we started.
We have a long term fc who has been with us 13 yrs and we adopted our younger fc when he was 18months old 5yrs ago.
So our children are now 30, 28, 21, 14 and 6 .

@Whatthechicken I’m very much the same with the chickens and the veg and thinking there’s a business in there somewhere. I also enjoy doing up old furniture. Maybe a combination of all of it and a bit of childminding in school hours only would be the answer 🤔

I’m an actuary, I only work part time (four short days), when I was in the office I could walk my son to school and I only needed around 45 minutes of after school care.

I’m also a semi-professional rugby player, I took six months out, after that I would take him to training sessions and matches.

Hi

I work for local council 2 days a week, have a good understanding boss and in general have been lucky with support and understanding. I also am a Avon Representative which I love and really fits in well, my boy is my Avon Helper 🤣

@Clarabeau78

that’s fab, start ‘em young, does he have shares ?

My son has two jobs, a paper round and a saturday job in the local grocers - I’ll be able to retire soon

He's only 5 but he's been trained well, he spends all my commission on bubble bath 🤣🤣

I'm an accountant in commerce. I arrange my hours so work early in the morning do two long days of over 10 hours then can finish at 2pm on Thurs and Friday. That means my adopted son goes into wraparound school care two days, breakfast club five days and I can pick him up from school three days. That said now working from home all the time due to covid so he is no longer doing after school club etc. Try to find a full time option then see of you can mix your hours around.

Residential Care Worker in a home for Looked After Children.