Books for children of adult adoptees

[Arborea]

I hope it's ok to post this here: I've tried a search but couldn't find anything.

I was adopted at birth and now have 2 children who are at the age to start asking questions about families, where babies come from etc. My 7 yo recently asked about me growing in Grandmother's tummy, and I hadn't really prepared for this, so I don't think I handled it as well as I could have. Although I gave a truthful answer about being adopted my older child is now very interested in what happened my biological parents, what is meant by someone's 'real parents' and all sorts of questions about what it means in terms of relationships.

I've always felt very secure as part of my adoptive family, but now the questions are coming thick and fast, and I feel it would be good to get some story books to explore these questions in a sensitive way. I hadn't realised how well my parents had done it until the topic came up with my MIL. She is a lovely woman and I'm very fond of her, but what's happened reminds me a lot of how she can sometimes 'put her foot in it', and I'm really keen to tackle this with my kids with a bit more depth and encourage empathy.

My younger child is 4 so is also able to understand a little, although not as interested as the older one in asking direct (often disarming!) questions.

We had a family bereavement last year, which my older child can still get upset over, and in my own case from what I know of my biological background my birth mother was young, single and it would have been considered that she couldn't cope. As a result, I'd prefer if possible to swerve parental bereavement stories, or stories with frightening sub texts (e.g. Orphan Annie)

Any and all tips about books, films etc gratefully received.

I don't have the answer, but as the child in this position, all I can say is, well done for being honest!

I found out my DM was adopted at 25 when my GM got dementia and blurted it out one day. It absolutely broke my heart. My relationship with both of them never recovered. I feel confident that had I just been told as a child it would never have been a 'thing'. It was the betrayal which hurt, all the BS of "oh you look so much like your GM when she was young" which was just impossible to get over.

My dc have known the ins and outs right from the beginning, details according to their age. It sounds as though you are not in touch with bio parents whereas we are which will make a bit of difference as my dc know personally the key people being talked about.

They will go through phases of asking a lot of questions and I try to just think on my feet and answer in a way which i think explains it, puts it in context for them.

My advice would be to sit down on your own and think about how you want to tell them your story/their story and then do it rather than looking to a book.

Though you could then write a book for others as there seems to be a gap in the market!

I think it is very important for my dc to know their story as far back as possible, I see it very much as their story as it is mine.

@Wannakisstheteacher I am sorry to hear that

Place marking as am in same situation although my children are older. The only books / TV we can think of that explore some of the issues (pre adoption, present-day) are the Tracy Beaker series of course.

But v different if adopted as a baby 25+ years ago (somewhat longer in my case!)