False starts!

[selly24]

Omg- just need a bit of a hand hold really...
We made our initial enquiry about adoption in spring 2014!
False start 1) Local LA- realised we needed a bigger place and this would require moving home and town.
2015 False start 2) VA Debatable wether this was a poor Social worker or ‘real’ issues - started well- husband started doing voluntary work with school aged children which he loved- issue raised: our property had no garden( ( despite being steps away from huge open spaces and playgrounds) SW flagged ‘where would the bikes go?’) more pressingly refused to progress because medical advisor flagged my weight combined with one BP reading. Was crushed! Told to return a minimum of three months later and when weight dropped to 80 kg. Received a phone call a month later saying that her manager had discussed the case and that we should now restart!
At that point felt too fragile and disheartened to return...
2018 False start 3) we were better informed, positive, were poised to move to a new area, contacted the adoption LA team to arrange for a home visit...House purchase fell through and ended up renting elsewhere while things got sorted!

2019 False start 4) Settled in new home with building work avd of course a garden and bike storage! Building work complete and ready to begin in earnest. Home visit went v well. Training booked for the next convenient session. Bombshell at DH work. They are making redundancies ( Ge is the main earner). But assured he is safe- so far.... Let Adoption Team know that for the moment we will have to pause....

False start 5) He decides to look for work closer to home which will enhance family time in the long term.. GETS A NEW JOB woo hoo! Takes voluntary redundancy, all poised. Finishing old job 14th March due to start new role 23rd March.... Things stabilising....we can call the adoption team....Covid-19 restrictions ramp up... DH starts new role wfh. Country in lockdown ...Where does that leave us!!???...

I know Adoption is a journey but ours it seems is going to be an epic, arduous expedition!?
We are probably not the only ones though - are we!?

I really feel for you. It took my DH and I 5 years to get to approval through a similar series of set backs including health issues, job related issues and bereavement. I’m a CP social worker and trauma therapist - it literally should have been the easiest assessment in the world but life just kept on happening. 5 years and 6 months after starting the process we brought home our two DC though - never loose sight of the end result.

Fingers crossed for some progress, it can be so very disheartening.

Thanks for your reply! Yes, life just keeps getting in the way... However, lockdown has made me realise other things can wait.....

It took me four years from the point I first enquired, but I spent a couple of years getting myself in a strong enough financial position, and then switched jobs for an improved adoption package.

The panel commented on my resilience!
keep going - I believe in fate, if I had got through quicker my path wouldnt have crossed with my son so life worked out how it should have done

@selly24 As @Ted27 said, some of us have had epic adoption journeys that really demonstrate our ability to be flexible, persevere, roll with life's punches and demonstrate resilience. These are all key abilities that adopters need! Hang on in there! 💐

Definitely going to big up the resilience and perseverance!! Thanks for the encouragement!