In the planning stages

[Stitchious]

Hi all,

I'm new to Mumsnet but I joined as I found this group when I was looking into adoption views. I definitely want to adopt but am starting out in the seriously saving and planning stage, I'm 32 at the moment I'll be doing this single in a few years (probably at least 3 years from now) and I have a question I was hoping someone might be able to help me with. I have a fair amount of experience with children, i used to child-mind my little cousins and did child care at college (I stopped as I didn't like the nursery settings too much structure for my liking) and I helped my sister raise my nephew from baby to about 7 when she moved to a new area with her partner. The thing is though all this is a good 8-15 years ago, so my query is will I have to go out and try and find more experience that is newer or will the experience I have be enough? I do have young nieces and nephews now (but I don't see two of them at the moment due to a huge family fall out!) but obviously in 3-4 years they will be ranging in age from 5-16 and I won't live by some of them anymore (my family is pretty spread out and I'm planning on moving back up to near my dad as I'm not fond of city living overly) any way I'll stop rambling now and just say thank you for any help you can give me :)

Personally I think if you have been a child minder this will be enough - you have experience in the age ranges you’re looking to adopt - so I think you’d be great.

I think the child care experience issue does vary from social worker agency to agency - me and my partner have relatively little experience but we still managed to adopt a young baby. We may have been an exception - as we both work in schools so have a lot of safe guarding experience...! But have also read on here of people having loads of experience and then told they need more...!

I think a lot depends on the social worker but I feel like whatever you have done they always want slightly more and showing willing goes a long way. I'd had a lot of recent experience in different contexts but the social worker wanted me to be actively doing something while going through approval so I did a bit (not a lot) of volunteering at the children's centre and this seemed to tick the box. I also kept a log of the time I spent with my friends' children, both with and without their parents, and included what I'd done, observations of the children's and parents' behaviour, how I dealt with any problems and my own reflections and learning on each of these occasions. My social worker LOVED this.

If I was in your position I'd just get ready to sell the experience you've gained and in the event the SW asks you for more then cross that bridge when you get there.

I've just reread your post and something you will need to think about is your support network. I don't know if you already have friends where you are moving to but support network is a big thing in adoption and with your family being spread out the SW will want to be satisfied that you have enough people around you to support you, especially being a single adopter.

Thank you for your great replies, I will definitely be adding volunteer work to my list of what I need to have ready :) its interesting that SW seem to have different opinions on experience across the board but I will err on the side of caution and find some volunteering to do

@sunshineandskyscrapers I probably should have been clearer on that one, I have mother and step father complete with two step siblings where I currently live and my father and step mother plus the rest of my family (and its huge!) where I want to move to, I'm essentially moving home and I can't wait to be back at my old stomping grounds, the move is for many reasons but one of them is that I have a fair amount more support back in my hometown than I do in the city. Of course my mother will still be a big support and she is willing to come and help when needed and when suitable and appropriate for LO. (I think she's also aiming to move back that way too, so this will give her the perfect excuse .

anyway thank you for reading my ramble and answering :) I hope you all have a good evening :)

Sounds like the support network is ready and waiting for you. I know you're not looking to go ahead for a good while yet but good luck with it when the time comes.

I think you probably should be prepared to get some more up to date experience, I have heard of teachers being asked to get more experience!
You have a ready made network which is great, so as a fellow single adopter, I'd say next things to focus on are financial stability and making sure you can afford adoption leave. Having a family friendly employer with flexible working also comes in handy!
good luck