Post info meeting - depression and migraines?

[user1479136681]

It was more intense than I had anticipated! The people we spoke to and the material we'd read made it sound like a walk in the park. The social worker was nice though.

My SO was v open about his history of depression (starting from his parents' difficult divorce) and he had a relapse last year. The social worker said she would talk to her line manager about it before issuing the ROI. She said it probably won't completely outrule us (erp on the 'probably'!) but we might have to delay/progress the application slowly and complete Stage 1 roughly October rather than within the usual 2 months. She said the panel would like to see a longer gap between the relapse (which was roughly a year ago) and the placement.

I don't mind delaying if it means we will be in a good position to adopt at the end of it. Also gives us plenty of time to get the kitchen redone. But I am worried about being rejected. My SO is very open and self-reflective, and has done lots of CBT so I hope it will be okay. I think he will be a good parent partly because his experience with depression has made him more compassionate, patient etc.

SO also has a history of migraines although now he's on medication to prevent them and that has been working a treat. So hopefully that will be alright.

I don't have any issues apart from an anxiety diagnosis back in 2014 but that was linked to a stressful work environment. I found a new job and have been fine since.

I'd love to hear from others who have experience of adopting with health issues - how was the process for you?

user1479136681 I had anxiety about 20 years ago. We adopted 5 years ago. It was fine.

I think it does help to understand why your SO's relapse could be an issue. Your SO is open and honest and that does help but the
SW just want to be sure your SO is strong enough to weather the stress of adopting and be strong for the child, and you as well as themselves. Good luck.

The social worker said she would talk to her line manager about it before issuing the ROI. She said it probably won't completely outrule us (erp on the 'probably'!) but we might have to delay/progress the application slowly and complete Stage 1 roughly October rather than within the usual 2 months.

I'm always a bit concerned when posters put something like this that the agency are just gaming the timescale targets. It's not the line manager's decision when you put in a ROI- that's your decision that you wish to pursue adoption.

Stage 1 taking until october is a loong time. Italian is dead right about the work that any agency will need to do, as long as they aren't just fobbing you off.

The key issue is whether the depression and migraines would limit your capacity to adopt. That means you need solid evidence that the conditions are controlled and a PAR which sells your strengths and addresses your risks.

Have you shopped around for agencies? You want to make sure that the one you pick will 'market' you effectively. In your situation I thing choice of agency is particularly important.

Hubby is on medication for migraines and we were successful.