Adopted child /letter box

[Mumtotwo30]

So almost six years ago my eldest son was adopted not by choice its a long story I was in a physically violent relationship at the time anyway I was given letterbox contact which is once a year and no problems with it this year I waited as normel for my letter and not received it not even an reason from the adoptive parents for not sending my letter as usual anyone else gone through this?? Also I now have a anouther child with a loving partner and I have told my eldest in my previous letters about having a brother which I did seek advice for doing that and was told that's OK just wondering why letterbox would just stop

Honestly don’t assume it is anything to do with the adopters. Letterbox can be absolute crap, the letter could be in the office still. Give them a call and ask.
If it is to do with the adopters, anything could have happened. Illness/moving house/crisis/life changes. I mean this kindly, but we have things that affect our lives too. I try to never be late for letterbox. In fact, I often send it 3 weeks early because our letterbox team seem to take 5weeks to process it! But if I was ill or something difficult happened then my life would come first. Just trying to reassure you that there may be a perfectly innocent explanation

I have phoned the office a few times to check if it's come it was due September going to be in November soon they have sent several reminder letters to the adopters and there has been no reply I understand if there is stuff going on its been late before but they usually contact the office and let them know they tell me just heard nothing I just like to be reassured my son is OK look forward to it every year

I can understand that. If they have been good every year then something significant could have happened. How old is your son? Could he be at an age where he is not comfortable with letterbox? You mentioned letting him know he has a sibling, perhaps that could have affected him? I’m just wondering if he is old enough to have an opinion now on such things.

He is almost 11 now thru said he's always happy to hear from me I sent previous letters about his sibling my other son who is now 2 never been a problem before

It's a funny age 11
Probably
Just started senior school
Finding his feet, hormonal, he
May just be having time to process
All of this. He may have started questioning things or just all of the above !

I agree, 11 is a funny age. You don’t really know if it has genuinely never been a problem before. It is a lot to process for a child, the fact that they were adopted but a birth mother keeps the next child. I really don’t wish to be upsetting but that is the reality sometimes. Children take years sometimes to process feelings and they aren’t able to look at it logically. What wasn’t a problem before can soon flare up. He may have genuinely been fine with letterbox but then they become more understanding and aware. Some children decide against it. It can be a bit of a minefield.

I never wanted to give him up it was not my choice I love him Just as much as my other son I always write to him every year the adopters said he was happy to hear from me I don't know what's happened

Oh OP, I know. I didn’t mean to upset you, more try to answer you honestly. But none of us know the reason for no letter this year and that must be so hard. The problem with letterbox is it can become very complex as they get older. It can raise lots of questions and problems. That may not even be the case this time, perhaps there was a death in the family etc. Perhaps they moved house and haven’t informed letterbox yet. I know that doesn’t help you though