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Original poster

Slightly light hearted... how do you stop it taking over your every thought!

12 replies

excitedmuchly · 13/09/2018 16:50

How do you stop the adoption process and the general thinking about adoption / children/ futures from taking over your every waking ( and dreaming!) thought?

Slightly light hearted however I'm finding it's all I think about!!

Please someone come along and tell me they are the same!

From the stress and frustration of the ( sometimes) painfully slow process to standing on my now complety empty spare bedroom planning wallpaper and curtains!!

OP posts:
Smudgymoo · 13/09/2018 18:28

I am finding it difficult to not let it take over every thought at the moment to be honest!

we have matching panel next week and we are getting nervous! every conversation is about how our lives are going to change so drastically (first time parents). I am having nightmares about missing an email from our sw about a form that we haven't filled in properly and that they need more information on.

Our response is to go out for dinner a lot (we won't be able to do this as easily soon hopefully!). So far, last Thursday we went to Frankie and Bennies, on Sunday we went for Chinese, today we're going to our favourite Turkish, tomorrow we have a wine tasting... I know we'll probably go out for dinner twice next week!

We should probably go to the gym as well, but that was shut this week...... that can be next weeks' job!

Smudgymoo · 13/09/2018 18:29

Sorry, realised there was no advice there for you, but there is solidarity!!!!

PurpleMac · 13/09/2018 18:51

It did take over my every thought, from the start of Stage 1 right through til placement day! I don't think there's any way around it Wink

GiddyGardner · 13/09/2018 19:29

It does, I'm not sure there is anything you can do about it. I think you should enjoy the planning (even if it is just in your mind at this stage - not sure where you are at). I know it's very different, but those that have birth children had this planning time, so maybe see it as similar.

It feels like the process did take ages at the time for us, but ours have been home for four weeks now and the process seems like a blur now. Something's that I thought were important to plan then though, are not so much four weeks in. Apparently my ability to climb slides and slide down them and my speed at running with the double buggy are the best and most important things ever!! Enjoy the planning, all the best. xx

Original poster
excitedmuchly · 13/09/2018 22:03

Phew.... not just me then!! Am trying to do all kinds of 'me' things and focus on that but it's just so hard!!

OP posts:
DLouise2004 · 14/09/2018 00:23

I feel the same - people keep on telling me to do things that recent do with kids but we are so exhausted decorating and kid proofing the house that is hard! It really does take over all your thinking! Am here to ride or out with you! X

insmithereens · 14/09/2018 09:30

It's all I thought, talked & dreamt about for 18 months! I think my friends & family must have struggled with me, and I know my relationships with some ppl did suffer. Now the kids are here & it's the same - I do wish I'd given myself a break before they got here as now it's even more all consuming! But I love them & wouldn't have it any other way.

Ted27 · 14/09/2018 12:40

Its hard not to let it take over. I found I had to set myself specific ' big' targets. I tained for a 5k run, then 10k and then a half marathon. I had a delay so then decided to have a last big expedition style trip ( two weeks in Uganda) which I had to train for.

I think I decided if I wore myself out physically I would be too knackered to stress about it - worked more or less !

Original poster
excitedmuchly · 14/09/2018 13:22

I'm trying to get all the boring tasks done now... so new car/ new phone contract/ new glasses/ new mortgage deal etc...getting everything in order..... just so I am ultra organised when the time comes!

OP posts:
topcat2014 · 14/09/2018 21:47

I posted the exact same question 6 months back :)

Our first SW gave us the good advice to "not put your life on hold", and we have stuck to that.

Looks like we have an approval panel in November, which will be a year since sign up.

So, yes, it is getting a little bit nearer - so we are not booking foreign holidays for next year, but apart from that it is normal life.

I try not to bore friends to death about it either - but I can do if given the chance!!

topcat2014 · 14/09/2018 21:48

@excitedmuchly - good luck with the organisation!

topcat2014 · 14/09/2018 21:48

Oh, and I have a half marathon in two weeks eek

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