Stage 1 Prep Training

[teekay88]

Hi everybody. I hope everyone's journey is going okay at the moment. I'm pleased to say we have been accepted onto stage 1 training Barnardos in September. We have 4 sessions plus a review appt at the end.

We got the flyer for the first session yesterday which will be entitled "Parenting and Loss" and the description says that "the workshop will help participants understand their own experience of loss and childhood experiences of being parented"

Any advice on what to expect and prepare for? Thankyou xx

Sorry that should have said that we are with a LA but training is via Barnardos

Hi. I did my stage 1 training last month.... I found it really useful although it does tend to focus on the negative so... think positive!!

The loss bits really hit home- I don't want to say what we did just in case its the same (I am with a agency but not Barnardos) as I don't want to spoil it for you but it just makes you place yourself in a child's head... and about their loss and what it means to them.

The parenting bit is just getting you to think about how you were parented and the important things for you. For me... having an amazing childhood this was really good but others in our group who had a more tricky childhood did find this difficult at times.

My advice would be to go in with an open mind and try and get as much out of it as possible. My best parts where meeting and talking with people who had adopted as I found their 'real life' experiences the most helpful. Take some notes during the day and when you get home as you will be asked to show these at your end of stage 1 visit (well I have been asked to have them ready for my visit next week)

Make sure you share numbers with the others on your training- I have made a couple of new friends through it and hope that we will build on this throughout our journeys.

oh and... make sure the wine is in the fridge as you'll feel like a nice glass!!

Happy to answer any other questions you may have.... if I can :) x

Hi there so sorry for the delay - thanks so much for your reply. yes i had an idea it may feel a little like that so am going into it expecting that although as you say i think illl need to work on having some things to look fwd to after the sessions and get into a headspace where i can counter balance that side of things with some optimism. im a natural pessimist and keep expecting the process to go wrong but expect ill gain a bit of confidence further down the road when i feel more sure of how they see us

really good idea about staying in touch with other adopters that would be really nice. good shout about notes my only worry is my writing is appalling and only usually makes sense to me haha but maybe i will type up or something so they are at least a bit cohorent!

can i ask how it feels from the point of view of feeling analysed/assessed? our sw has told us the training are part of the assessment, but im worried this will make me feel watched and i wnt be able to relax or be myself because ill be 2nd guessing what they want me to do or say. im worried ill say something theyll read into!

we've been told we'll have a stage 1 feedback session about a week after training finished - would that be to let us know outcome of whether we are progressing to stage 2 or do you think thats just a more general piece of feedback about our partricipation in training?

sorry one final q! i know its incredibly hard to estimate but how long did you find the transition between end of sessions and starting stage 2? weve been told to expect some paperwork in a welcome pack to come through in a week or so that their guidance says helps them to do their checks so i am assuming the idea is they get going wiht the checks in the background to roughly coincide with end of training but not sure? thanks again xxxxxxxx

Hi. I didn't feel as if I was being judged or assessed at any point during the training... although I'm sure i was!! They didnt weite notes eveey time anyone spoke... which i did wonder if they would!! I think just be yourself and just get involved. They often asked for ideas or suggestions or what we were thinking and for us to get involved ( no role play so don't panic!) So I guess if you just sat there and said nothing and didn't get involved it would be an issue.

My stage 1 sign off meeting is this week... the whole start to finish of stage 1 has been just under 6 weeks for me. Part of that is due to me being really on the ball getting paperwork back to them asap. The paperwork side can hold things up a lot. Your doctors medical for example. I rang up for an appointment on a Fri expecting it to take weeks but was lucky to get an appointment on the mon! But even once it has been signed off by your doctor it then has to be approved by the adoption doctor which can take time.

Good luck!! X x

Sorry forgot to say about paperwork.... I had to do the following all as part of stage 1
*Medical
*Financial info... basically in and outgoings now.. and when on adoption leave / after adoption. Including savings / debts etc
*health and safety form on your home.. just a questionnaire about how safe your house is. I filled in a lot of mine saying... Will be.. for example it asked about whether medication is stored in a locked cupboard... as a single person with just me and the cat... no but it will be !!

• family tree
• support network type of spider with you and child in middle. Who will be there for you both emotionally and physically.
• pet questionnaire!! *dbs police check
• 3 references... 1 can be family.They just ask for emails or addresses and send them a set of questions