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Adoption

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Original poster

Being daft- so bloody upset

28 replies

Headwobble · 07/04/2018 06:59

Years ago, when my husband and I finally had a house with a garden after years of renting crummy flats, we bought a rabbit to celebrate.

That sodding rabbit was there with us through all our house moves. He was there through all our infertility problems. Finally, he was there through our entire adoption process and has been our beautiful child’s pet for the last 2 years. He has taught her how to be gentle and she adores feeding him and stroking him. He has provided her with hours of excitement.

The time has come for the old boy to be put down. He has been ill (all elderly rabbit related) for some time and the vet can do nothing. He is in pain with arthritis (barely hops) and has now decided to stop cleaning himself. I can’t bear seeing him so miserable. Next week he will be hopping off to the sky.

I have cried on and off for weeks about this because I knew the end was nigh.

I would always have been upset but I think I feel it more because he has been such a gorgeous living thing, so gentle and he has been there through so many different difficult times. But most of all, through the adoption of our beautiful daughter. I have a special bond with that rabbit because of that.

I also hate that I’m having to make the decision to put him down. I’d rather he made his own choice on that!!

People don’t quite get why I’m so upset about this pet but I figured that the adoption board ladies would!

OP posts:

EightWellies · 07/04/2018 07:10

Awh. Of course you're sad. I don't think you're being at all daft. Sending you 💐

eyeoresancerre · 07/04/2018 07:14

So so understandable, he sounds just adorable. You know he can't be in pain anymore and you're doing the right thing. Perfectly fine to be gutted by it though. Thinking of you.

Leyani · 07/04/2018 07:49

Big hugs

Anxious123 · 07/04/2018 08:28

My dog came to me just after I relinquished he has been my absolute hero in the darkest of days. I get it. Totally get it. Be kind to you xx

MrsMozart · 07/04/2018 08:30

It's horrible even when it's for all the right reasons. Sending you a hug and a handhold.

flapjackfairy · 07/04/2018 08:43

Oh it is so hard isnt it.
My cat had to be put to sleep 4 yrs ago and it was me that took him. I felt so much guilt but knew absolutely that i had done the right thing . It has taken a while but we have just had a new cat so give yourself time. It is a loss and you need to grieve and as you say the rabbit has taken on extra significance by being bound up emotionally to your adoption experience.
Sending hugs to you all. It will be hard on your child and may lead to her being a bit wobbly for a while as it may of course trigger fears of further loss and rekindle memories of previous ones but you will come through it.
And remember you gave your pet a wonderful life. There cant have been many other rabbits who have had such a great life. X

JustHappy3 · 07/04/2018 08:44

Not daft at all.

Original poster

Headwobble · 07/04/2018 09:49

Thank you all, I really appreciate the sympathy
My daughter is nearly 3 so is too young to understand but yes, she will definitely notice he isn’t there!! Especially when his hutch goes. It isn’t worth keeping it as it’s on it’s last legs (like the old boy himself!).

Considering getting chickens next as can’t bare the idea of replacing the rabbit. These blooming pets have no idea what they mean to us do they!

Yes the guilt will really hurt. I also don’t like that the vet won’t let me be with him at the end. We’ve had loads of small animals over the years and I’ve never been allowed. He is terrified of the vet too, he just launched himself into my arms. He won’t have the energy to do that this time but he will still be scared

OP posts:

MrsMozart · 07/04/2018 10:37

Why won't the vet let you be there? I've been at the end every time (cat, dogs, horses).

Ted27 · 07/04/2018 10:55

He sounds like a lovely bunny

I would go to another vet, as hard as it is I've been with all my pets when they went. The last thing I could do for them

flapjackfairy · 07/04/2018 11:16

Yes find another vet. Some will come to your home and do it !

bostonkremekrazy · 07/04/2018 14:17

We lost our old cat recently 🌹
That faithful puss had been with me since before I had my kiddies...she totally got it
I still miss her
Its the kindest hardest thing we have to do sometimes....hugs

worstwitch18 · 08/04/2018 00:21

Definitely find another vet- can't believe this one won't let you be there.

Pets can mean so much. I'm sorry your rabbit is unwell. X

LittleMissBrainy · 08/04/2018 06:36

I'm so sorry for you. I had something similar with my old dog a few weeks ago. He was 14 when our daughter came to us at 4 months and I was a bit worried t how he would react to her. They became the best of friends and just like yours, he taught her to be gentle and how to share. He was 15 1/2 when he was pts. However the good thing when you know it's going to happen is that you can plan it. Our old boy had (what I would
Imagine is) the perfect ending, we'd taken him to the vet that morning and confirmed that the end had truly come, so we made him comfortable and took him home. We lit a fire, he was on his bed surrounded by all of us, and we just hung out for the afternoon. The vet came about 5, we told LO (now 22 months) he was going to heaven and she kissed him goodbye, and he went to sleep with his head in my hands. LO cried for him when we took his body out the room but weirdly, since then, it seems she has accepted what happened really well. She has not asked about him at all, but we still talk about him all the time and she likes to look at photos of her and him, but really she seems very ok with it.
I think it's definitely easier when they are very old as (for us and it sounds like for you to), there was no doubt we were doing the right thing and not to put him to sleep would have just prolonged his inevitable passing.
Hope that helps and I'm sorry you have to go through this. Xxx

LittleMissBrainy · 08/04/2018 06:39

Sorry I've just read your post that the vet won't allow you to be there, what is his reasoning? I would definitely try to find another vet, as it's a difficult enough time that can be made easier with a sympathetic vet. Ours even sent us a card a few days later.

Original poster

Headwobble · 08/04/2018 07:22

I’m being a little unfair as I’m assuming I’m not allowed in as have never been before with other pets. However they were smaller animals so I wonder if it was because they had to be gassed first, then injected.

I will phone the vet and clarify tomorrow. Poor boy will have me crying all over him!

OP posts:

Dhal · 08/04/2018 07:28

Hey so sorry you are having to go through this. I don’t think you realise just how upset you will be when the time comes, but really find another vet.

I paid for them to do a home visit when I had to have my cat pts it was about £120 but worth every single penny. No stressful trip to the vets she was just on our bed and only a few seconds of discomfort rather than possibly an hour or so if we had to take her to the vets.

It was still horrible and sad but whenever I think about I was so glad someone told me you can get vets to come to you.

MrsMozart · 08/04/2018 08:26

Hope call with vet goes well.

In my experience there's an injection first that makes them go to sleep then the final injection. There can be some movement afterwards, which is just the muscles and nerves settling. The vet will check.

Italiangreyhound · 08/04/2018 08:58

So sorry for you.

Please do find another vet who lets you stay.

Please do tell your daughter when has gone that he died because the truth is letter she appropriate.

Italiangreyhound · 08/04/2018 08:59

better

Italiangreyhound · 08/04/2018 09:00

age appropriate

Original poster

Headwobble · 08/04/2018 09:14

Thanks all. He seems a bit perkier today so then I feel paranoid but then I take a whiff of him and look at his dirty fur... I’ve been cleaning him regularly as best I can but he sits in his own wee now so it is an impossible task. He will be at risk of fly strike. He used to be such a proud rabbit, always immaculate.

I will tell my daughter, I will have him put the night before and tell her we need to say good bye to him.

OP posts:

ladymariner · 08/04/2018 09:23

Think it must be a bit dusty here or something.... Head xxx

OurMiracle1106 · 08/04/2018 15:31

My flatmates dog went to the rainbow bridge a few weeks ago after being poorly. I cried like a baby all day and again when I got the message to say she had gone. (I’m tearing up now typing this). 4 years she had been a part of our home. My friend after operations, my mate and companion when lonely. I miss her

justawhisper · 08/04/2018 17:07

He knows you now have your beautiful daughter and he has done his job to support you and help you through some tough times. Now you have to do what's the best for him and free him from his pain. I'm so sorry X

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