Suggested books to help grandparents to be

[teekay88]

Hi all

My partner and I have been through Pre stage 1 with a few agencies and have decided to postpone our formal application for a few months so we can sort some life stuff out first (i.e. smoking, changes in job etc) and be in the best position to start the process positively

Its obviously extremely early days but we are now looking to tell our parents and some close family members about our plans so they can start to learn about it alongside us

Does anyone have any good recommendations for books to give family relatives? In particular grandparents to be?

Also when/how did you go about telling close family of your plans?

Many thanks

this one from Coram Baaf is what we bought for our families. They also attended a Friends and Family day at our LA.

Sorry, link not right. It’s called Related by Adoption and is available on Amazon.

Thanks so much thats great ill check it out. If you dont mind me asking how and when did you go about discussing with your parents?

I have told my siblings, but not planning on telling parents until stage 2, I think.

Don't want to create upheaval in the whole family if it becomes not needed.

There are plenty of grandchildren around on both sides to keep them occupied for the moment.

Hi, my parents just knew tbh. We’d discussed it with them some time before and had talked about it on and off for years. I don’t remember ever saying “we did this today”.

My parents in-law I left to my husband. They’re a bit more formal and I’d never discussed the inner workings of my uterus with them so left it to him. He had this conversation with them early on as our sw did all family referees in stage one and we asked both sets of parents to oblige.

I told my sister on the phone after stage one. She knew we’d do it some day but at that time had her own shit going on and I didn’t want her worrying.
I also told all of our other brothers and sisters on both sides around that time.

I told my parents when we were well into Stage 2, because as others have said I wanted it to be more 'definite' (as much as it ever is). They live in another country, so when I visited them, I told them over dinner. Their reaction was "you're very brave!" Now they absolutely dote on DD.

As well as books, you could consider encouraging people to listen to the adoption series on World at One on the iPlayer (there's a thread about this). Gives great insight.