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Adoption

Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on adoption.

Stage 1 what can I expect

9 replies

CantThinkOfAUserNameThatILike · 21/03/2017 21:45

Hi All.

Has anyone got any advice to offer with going through stage 1. I know I have been assigned a social worker but she hasn't contacted me as of yet or any of my referees to start the process off.

What would not make you pass stage one?

OP posts:
B1rdonawire · 22/03/2017 13:52

In terms of what to expect - waiting, lots of waiting Grin Just be yourself, be open and honest, and show you're willing to reflect and learn from the past. If they press you on something, try and be willing to explore it with them. It's the best way for them to get to know how you think and approach stuff.

Things that would make you not "pass"? Um, I don't think it's one size fits all, there are all kinds of good prospective adopters. I suppose if you had lots of aggressive animals and were 100% opposed to re-homing them, or if you have concerning things on your DBS check! Is there something that particularly worries you? Don't feel the need to define that on here, but maybe spend some time thinking how you would respond to concerns about it, so you have any answers lined up? Hope all goes well for you.

CantThinkOfAUserNameThatILike · 22/03/2017 21:12

Thank you for your response. No I have nothing that worries me. I was just curious about this stage as they don't seem to write much about this stage. I think from my initially discussions it's reference checks, workbook and maybe a workshop.

OP posts:
Poudrenez · 31/03/2017 10:58

Expect weekly visits that last several hours, and harden yourself to a level of intrusion that you might not be used to. Be honest, SWs are very good at getting things out of you, and there's no much point in resisting. I really thought I blew stage 1, but passed it quite comfortably in the end. It's meant to be tough, and it is. Post here if you need to offload!

Poudrenez · 31/03/2017 11:02

Sorry, I've just realised that I was talking about stage 2! Stage 1 was altogether easier - they'll want to know your motivations for adoption, and ask what sort of children you're willing to consider (be honest, although it does all feel a bit heartless). They'll do general checks on your home, criminal background etc. and give you some rather pessimistic books to read. Stage 2 is when it all gets a bit head-fuckery (IME).

CantThinkOfAUserNameThatILike · 05/04/2017 23:39

Poudrenez. Thank you for the update. I have just met my social worker and have been given my workbook. Training rates all booked for next month and I'm away. 😄

OP posts:
bluefeathers · 05/08/2017 13:49

Hello, not sure if this thread is still live but may I ask a question...

Could finances be something that hold us back? We had £10K in the bank but I've had to spend it on making improvements to a rental property we own. So no savings at all now and another £10K on a 0% credit card which we will easily pay off with the rental income. We make ends meet on our usual salary but not a lot left over, and we could be smarter with our spending. I'll get a year off full salary when we adopt.

Allgrownup3 · 05/08/2017 18:16

Hi, you need to take into account the cost of an additional child/children. When they are small children grow quickly. Depending on the age of the child you will also need to buy a cot/bed pushchair etc as they sometimes don't come with them.

I have been told that I needed to pay off my debts before I went to approval panel. An income and outgoings will be discussed with you in stage two.

luckylucky24 · 06/08/2017 06:39

Finances could hold you back yes. They will want you to dramatically reduce that 10k on credit card.
We had very little on credit card before I went on leave. We have about 7k on it now Blush

bluefeathers · 06/08/2017 09:00

The income from the rental will pay the debt off within the timescale. It was the cheapest and smartest way to get a loan (0%). It sits outside our day to day income and expenditure so I don't see why they should take it into account. I guess we'll have to go through the process and find out.

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