drholmes I asked about being a mum already because you may have 'survived' well without an extensive support network. I just think (experience here that we adopted when dd was 9 and her new ds 3, so big age gap) that you may end up needing more support with two than one. Some will say two are as easy as one. Well, maybe to some but not to me!
My ds has heairng appointments (all fine) and is currently having theraplay. My dd has had dyslexia appointments and now wants to go to the hairdresser with me and not have it done at home (now 11, nearly 12).
I always had support from family and friends (because I worked and child care once dd started school was harder - holidays etc) but I definitely need more support with two.
Re "... I just feel vulnerable talking to people about feelings and private stuff. But I guess I'm going to have to get used to it if I want to pass stage 2"
I am not sure that it is true that one always has to 'talk' to people about 'feelings and private stuff' to be good friends. But eventually I think it is important to be able to talk and share. The reason is that we can try and hold too much in, and not allow it a space to come out and be viewed/reflected on etc. The danger might be you need help (like the theraplay my son has been offered) but feel nervous about accepting help/additing you need it etc etc.
Theraplay is all about play and not about talking about problems at all!
But maybe even a fear of talking might steer you away from things that could be helpful or influential to you.
So i think a willingness to open up a bit' will be helpful but go slow, you do not need to reveal your whole self, at all, just begin to be a bit more open to talking to others and listening etc.
Also, remember, your little one's story is private so you do not (and should not) be revealing things about them, only about perhaps yourself and your life. Many people know ds is adopted but when we meet new people I do not tell them. If they found out, I would not deny it - but I do not share his story or even the fact he is adopted if it is not necessary to do so.
So you need to cultivate (IMHO) a selective way of revealing, and concealing, if you choose, and being happy to share what you share, so you can go away from conversations feeling comfortable and not feeling, 'I wish I had not revealed that!'
A good rule of thumb is you usually can reveal something at a later date, but you cannot take it back.
Anyway, friendship and closeness for many are also about shared experiences and fun and not just earth shattering revelations.
All the very best.