Questions for SW and FC

[RosieandJim89]

We are meeting Foster carer and SW for our match this week coming.
What questions should we be asking other than what size clothes/routine/like & dislikes?

It is useful to know what items e.g clothes, high chair, buggy etc will be coming with the child. This of course depends on their age. Congratulations!

Thank you.
We have most "big" things already as we have a pre-schooler. Would be helpful to know what toys etc she has though and how much stuff. We will hae to make room for them somehow.

My foster children are staying with me but, if I had had to move them on, I imagine I would have told the following information:

What they are like academically/developmentally. Eg. If they are ahead of or behind their peers, or in the middle, any real strengths or weaknesses, any extra support they've had, how much progress they've made since coming into care etc.

What they were like with me in the early days as they may revert to this type of behaviour in the early days of adoption.

Any 'patterns' of behaviour. For example, with one of mine, if he sees too many professionals within a short space of time this can affect his behaviour at school as he starts to feel unsettled.

How they get on with other children and adults particularly when at parks and soft plays etc and family gatherings.

Any health issues they have/had - even if resolved, as they might resurface. Eg. One of mine was a bed wetter and the other one used to soil pants daily for a while when he was having problems at school.

Any concerns that the fc has about how the children will cope with moving on. In lots of cases they have had the children for months or years so will know the children well and will have suspicions about they will react.

Don't be put off, but be realistic about the issues you may encounter.

As a Fc for 15 years I love this part. Ask about routines, likes/dislikes, the little things, like reactions too hair cuts, cutting nails. telly characters, any music that should be avoided ( we once had a child that would scream when anything from Queen came on the radio). What they are like to take out, hold hands/ run off.
Congratulations and good luck and enjoy

Thank you. Very good advice. I am adding these things to my list! AC is about to turn 1 and has been with foster carer for most of her life. Taking her away will be hard!

Sorry Rosie missed this thread. With our tiny we learnt so much during intros, eg in the bath he is ok with flannels, but not a sponge!

Taking our LO on that last day was hard for me but amazingly not for him - during intros week after 3 days he was turning to us rather than FC even though he'd been with them since birth.

6 weeks in I still can't believe it even though he's upstairs snoring away!
X

We gave our FC a little note book and told her if she thought of anything stuff dd likes betwwen out first meet and matching to note it down

It worked a treat we had things to refer to she even wrote down the words to have favourite song 😬

We are going to put that with dd stuff for when she older

Think pre-verbal senses:
smell is the strongest sensory link to memory. Ask them what washing powder/softener they use (and then use it yourself). Ask them if there are other common smells (!) ie do they use air fresheners or scented candles.
Are there bold colours they are surrounded by (particularly near the cot)
Do they use a mobile with sound or movement to get to sleep?
In what level of darkness do they get to sleep?