... my too cool for school 9 (going on 15) year old son forgot how cool he was and slipped his hand into mine as we crossed the road out shopping today. His hand was warm and dry and he squeezed mine slightly and smiled at me then it was gone.
I said a little thank you to the gods of the passing years for "the hand that makes me happy" (as it's known in our house).
Still many happy times to come I'm sure but it made me realise the passing of the years - whatever the challenges cherish these moments, the years whizz by so fast.
It's easy to get bogged down in tackling the difficulties that early life trauma can bring and to lose sight of those moments that remind you why you do it all.
He tries so hard to get stuff right, he tries harder than I've ever had to, at times it's easy to forget just how lucky I've been. I wish I had known on day 1 and through the early bonding difficulties just how it was all going to work out, I would have enjoyed those early days so much more if I'd had a crystal ball. I often tell people to live in the moment and to only tackle those problems that actually happen rather than the ones that you imagine might but I don't find it easy to take my own advice.
I wish I could capture every moment of the past 8.5 years and bottle them (well most of them!).
So try to take the advice I give and find so hard to take - one day at a time and cherish the good moments however hard they are to find at times.
Good luck to all those who are going through it or preparing for adoption.